Silent Storm
by the-sage-of-wind
Summary: The nameless Dragonborn finds herself in Windhelm to fulfill a promise to the leader of the Stormcloak Rebellion. Her life with the Stormcloaks are chronicled as clues about her past are slowly revealed. Despite her harsh past will she ever be able to find happiness from the one man she fears to be indifferent towards her? Rated M for violence, course language and sexual content.
1. Chapter 1

I

The only sound that could be heard around me was the harsh winter wind that blew around the large amount of snow, only to hinder my path. Thank the gods that my special steed Shadowmere was somewhat of an undead mount. She could handle the harsh terrain with ease. She aided me in more ways than one and provided companionship for my lonely existence.

The road to Windhelm was a treacherous and irritating path. It always snowed in this hold, but I was equally glad that I wasn't going to Winterhold; that city was always well below freezing. Many an unaware traveller had fallen victim to frostbite there.

"Come on Shadowmere; we're almost to the city," I tried to sooth my horse. Honestly, I didn't even think she heard me. Even if I used my Thu'um, I doubted that it would have been heard over this blasted wind.

There weren't many things that I believed in in life. Unfortunately, one of my strong beliefs was keeping promises to people that needed my help. I always - unless I was placed in dire circumstances - kept my word. That was the reason why I was going back to Windhelm. I made a promise to someone a couple of years ago that I intended to keep.

I could remember that fateful day like it was yesterday. It was the day that I met the man that was featured on so many of those Imperial wanted posters.

My head was pounding when I had woken up. _Where was I? This doesn't feel like a bed._ I remembered being captured at the Skyrim-Cyrodiil border along with a bunch of men that I didn't have time to recognize. The one thing I didn't remember was how I had gotten knocked out.

I looked down at my ragged prisoners robes. _Yes, _I thought. _I remember escaping prison in Cyrodiil. I had come to the borders of Skyrim only to be mistaken for someone else. Oh Talos, _I thought, my eyes going wide with realization.

When my vision fully focused, I finally figured out what was going on. My hands were bound and I was in a cart with three men; also prisoners. Two of them were having an ongoing conversation about something that I wasn't paying any attention to. I turned around, observed my surroundings and noticed where the cart was heading.

We were going to Helgen.

My stomach clenched at this thought. With all these prisoners in these carts, I could only assume that we were going to a trial.

_ Or an execution. _

I bit my lip to hide my fear. I couldn't believe that my twenty years of a harsh, disappointing existence would end just because I was most likely at the wrong place at the wrong time.

The man closest to me on my left noticed my attentiveness. He turned his eyes onto me. "Oh, you're awake," he remarked. I noticed he was wearing Stormcloak armour. The ongoing civil war that raged through Skyrim was one that was tearing the province apart. If this man was a Stormcloak, then…

My thoughts were interrupted by the man beside me. He was explaining our situation as if I was too incompetent to figure it out. I wasn't listening. Instead, I turned to my right for the first time to get a closer look at the large Nord beside me. I felt my breath hitch in my throat as I saw him. He was the leader of the Rebellion.

"Ulfric Stormcloak?" I asked, gawking at him. All eyes in the cart turned to me, but I just continued to stare at the man like he was some kind of sight to behold. I recognized him immediately from the wanted posters he was on after killing the High King of Skyrim with his "Voice", as others called it.

He was the only one in the cart who was gagged; I didn't realize at the time that it was to prevent him from using his Thu'um to escape. He stared at me with an unreadable expression in his eyes. He was handsome – rugged, but quite easy on the eyes. He had to be in his late fourth or early fifth decade of life and the age showed on his face. Surprisingly though, his hair was the colour of sand, with no grey visible. If it wasn't for the age lines on his forehead and the deep scar on his left cheek, the average person may not know he had lived _before _the Great War.

We continued to stare at each other. The other two men in the cart were regarding our exchange with genuine curiosity. _What else did they have to do before they were beheaded? _

I could only imagine what I looked like. I had escaped from prison, and I knew I was covered in dirt and scrapes from the capture. But he continued to stare at me like I was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. I continually grew annoyed that I had no idea what he was thinking. The Jarl of Windhelm was sitting beside me and I had no clue what to say to him.

I was about to ask the Stormcloak man on my left a question when the horse thief across from Ulfric started speaking first. "Instead of staring at the Jarl, you could stare at me all day if you want. I wouldn't say no to a kiss or two," the horse thief remarked smoothly. I had heard him whining about where we were going the whole ride and now he had the nerve to try to seduce me? Some of these men were so typical.

I snorted. "If we weren't heading to an execution, I _wouldn't_ say no to cutting off your balls," I said evenly. This was my way of getting men to leave me alone when they tried to bed me; it usually worked, but some needed a more physical message. These men weren't used to a woman who could think for herself.

The thief gasped and didn't say another word to me the entire ride. I looked at Ulfric again. Despite the gloomy situation, I thought he was smiling at my remark. The moment was short lived however because his forehead creased downwards in what seemed to be worry.

I couldn't blame him for being worried. He had gone through such an ordeal already and I didn't think it fair for him to die without proclaiming his right to the throne. _All his efforts were for nothing, _I thought bitterly. _We have a lot in common. _

There wasn't much chatter from the other prisoners as we arrived in Helgen. I can remember General Tullius accusing Ulfric of murder and after that, most of it was a blur. The horse thief tried to run and was shot down by arrows in the process. A Stormcloak soldier was beheaded. My stomach lurched fearfully at the gruesome sight. My only hope was that the Imperials would realize that I wasn't supposed to be there.

It was my turn next. The Imperial officer couldn't find my name on the manifest of prisoners. No one knew who I was. Even though I wasn't supposed to be there with all the Stormcloaks, they decided to execute me anyways.

As I was led over to the chopping block, I felt fear; fear and regret. My life was so short; how could it end so quickly? I hadn't even found my true purpose. I was shoved to my knees and forced to lay my neck down on the block of wood that housed the pool of blood from the beheaded soldier. I was fairly certain that his head was still in the basket in front of me.

I didn't even feel like crying. I barely cried anyways but one would think that as they are on the brink of death they would feel some sort of sadness. My eyes shut closed. _This is the end. _

And that's when it happened. I heard it before I saw it. A loud roaring-like sound was coming from the sky. _What in Oblivion was that? _I thought. _By the Nine, what did it matter when I was about to be dead soon?! _

My eyes flew open when I heard a loud smashing sound. I thought my heart stopped when I saw what was perched on one of the Helgen buildings.

It was a giant black dragon.

I had heard rumours about dragons returning to Skyrim, but who would have known that one would show up in Helgen _just _as I was about to be executed? In my fear and confusion I felt the first flicker of hope I had felt in days.

Everyone was screaming now in a mad attempt to evacuate the city. The dragon used a strange breath attack on me and the surrounding people that knocked those standing down to their knees. I got up from the ground and looked around at my surroundings for a quick escape. I found Ulfric Stormcloak with a couple of his soldiers running into a building. I sprinted towards the door before it closed behind me. "Prisoner!" A man raised an eyebrow in surprise at me as I shoved my small body in.

I recognized him as the man who was in the cart with me on the way to Helgen. Jarl Ulfric took no heed of me as he quickly gave instructions to his officer. He had a deep, accented voice. "Prisoner! Follow me if you want to live!" The officer barked at me.

I turned to Ulfric quickly. "I promise you Sir, that if we make it out of the city alive, I will join your cause and bring you victory against the Imperial scum," I spat out.

Ulfric stared at me and then gave me a curt nod. Nothing more was said between us; it was a long time before I saw him again.

As we escaped the city, I learned that the officer's name was Ralof. He seemed remarkably surprised at how skilled I was with a blade as we fought our way through Imperial soldiers.

I stayed with Ralof in Riverwood so I could rest up and heal my wounds. Once I made it to Whiterun to warn Jarl Balgruuf of the dragon attacks, I found out the reason for my existence.

Most people don't even use my real name. I am called Dragonborn, or Dovahkiin. I had the body of a mortal and the soul of the dragon. It was my destiny to destroy the evil dragon Alduin and restore peace to Tamriel.

A year later when I dealt Alduin that final blow I fell to my knees and cried for the first time in years. I didn't even know why I wept. The threat was over.

I didn't stop there. As the Last Dragonborn, I had some loose ends to tie up. My biggest concern was taking a boat trip to Solstheim to defeat the First Dragonborn. Miraak proved to be a bigger threat than Alduin was. I was almost killed in that battle, but after it was over my Thu'um became stronger than ever. The Greybeards were astonished at how far I had come since I first discovered that I was Dragonborn.

To my dismay, I was one of the most famous people in Skyrim. I was talked about constantly even though most had no idea what I looked like. A lot of old-fashioned Nords were certain that the Dovahkiin was a man. It didn't matter to me what other people thought. I preferred to protect my anonymity. When others found out who I really was, I was either admired or feared. Most people who knew about me never looked at me as a normal person. I hated being treated as an abnormality. Despite this, my power has come in handy in many situations that could have meant death for me or a comrade.

Now, two years since that day in Helgen, I was finally going to fulfill my promise to Jarl Ulfric Stormcloak. The war raged on and the people of Skyrim were growing tired of losing their families. It needed to end soon and I hoped I could finally help lead the Stormcloaks to victory.

Finally after what seemed like forever, I saw the Windhelm Stables through the snow storm. I paid for a safe place for Shadowmere to sleep in for the night and I grabbed my stuff to try to make my way through the snow to the city's entrance.

The poor guard in front of the door signaled the men on top to open the gate. The great metal door heaved open and I squeezed in, along with the other travellers trying to find a place to stay for the night.

I sighed with jubilation when I saw the city. It had been a long time since I had even visited this hold. Windhelm was a very old city full of history. It was still early in the day, so my first inclination was to rent a room at Candlehearth Hall and wash up before going to the Palace of the Kings to talk to Ulfric.

Most of the residents recognized me and greeted me accordingly. I tried to be nice to everyone I met; therefore I had no prejudice against any race. Throughout my adventures in Skyrim, I had met some really good people and additionally some really bad ones. I refused to damn an entire race just for the actions of a handful.

Once I checked into the Inn, I gave the barkeep coin to use their bathhouse. This type of wandering life was something I was accustomed to. After my bath, I stared at myself in the mirror. Except for the long scar under my left eye that was almost 3 inches long, my pearl white face was almost flawless. Although I didn't really think I was pretty, I supposed that I saw the draw for men. I figured that since men seemed to fall in love with me wherever I went, I couldn't be completely repulsive.

My long, dark brown hair was obnoxious to tame. I had rippling curls that descended halfway down my back. It framed my face, and always seemed to bring out the shimmer of my green eyes. I brushed it out so it fell down the front of my armour in waves. I wanted to look somewhat respectable. I learned that it wasn't a wise thing to look like a peasant in front of a Jarl.

After grabbing a quick lunch, I walked down the busy streets of Windhelm. I rolled my eyes at the men whose mouths dropped open when they gazed on me. I hated the attention. Men didn't understand that I wasn't willing to bed them. After what happened to me as a child I couldn't give myself to any man. Once I had healed, I had promised myself that I wouldn't lay with a man for anything less than love. I knew though that with the kind of woman I was, I didn't deserve love. I had never felt it. Fondness, yes, but love…I wasn't even sure it existed.

(~~)

The guards at the Palace of the Kings let me in immediately when they recognized that I was the Dragonborn of Legend. I had been here before, many times actually when dealing with the murders that were happening in Windhelm. Ulfric was never around at this time, so my dealings were merely with his Steward, Jorleif.

Ulfric Stormcloak was sitting on his throne at the end of the long hall arguing with his housecarl and friend Galmar Stone-Fist. The throne room had a large echo to it, so I could hear every word they were saying if I had decided to pay attention.

They took no notice of me as I made my way to the end of the dining table to interrupt their conversation. I saw my friend Jorleif sitting at the table eating lunch. He looked up from his plate and gasped when he saw me. "By the Nine!" He exclaimed, standing up. "Dragonborn, could that really be you?" Ulfric and Galmar stopped talking at the mention of the word Dragonborn. They were both sizing me up, probably wondering how this skinny Nord woman could possibly be the Dovahkiin.

I grinned at Jorleif. "Indeed."

The small Nord pulled me into a hug. He picked me up and spun me around as if I weighed nothing. "Talos, is it ever good to see you!" He laughed when he set me down.

I laughed with him. "It has been a while, hasn't it?"

"Jorleif," Ulfric interrupted in his deep voice. We all turned to look at him. He didn't take his curious eyes off of me when he asked, "How is it that you know the Dragonborn?"

"She's the one who solved the series of murders in our hold milord," he replied.

Ulfric cockily sat on his throne like most of the Jarls in Skyrim. "Is that true Dragonborn?" He asked me.

"Yes my Jarl," I replied with a smirk. "It seemed like the guard were too _busy _with the war to find the murderer themselves."

His eyebrows flew up in surprise. "You sure give your opinion readily for so young a woman."

I bowed my head to him. "Thank you," I said hiding my smile. I didn't think he meant it to be a compliment, but it was a custom to let him know I was grateful anyways.

He propped his chin up with his right hand and observed me carefully. I knew he had no idea what to think of me. We hadn't talked since Helgen and it was clear from his lost expression that he didn't recognize me from then. He was staring at me as if he was trying to remember where he had seen me from.

A year ago, I probably would have seen him again if I had succumbed to the wishes of Jarl Balgruuf the Greater of Whiterun. Balgruuf wanted me to talk to the Greybeards to work out some negotiation process that involved General Tullius and Ulfric Stormcloak. I refused because I knew I didn't have time for that; I had to go find Alduin immediately. Eventually, upon furious persuasion from my part, Balgruuf relented and let me use Dragonsreach to capture my new dragon friend Odahviing so I could find out where Alduin was hiding.

As Ulfric stared at me, I had thought that he may ask me where he had seen me before, but instead he said, "What brings you to Windhelm Dragonborn?"

"Joining your cause, of course," I replied.

Galmar advanced towards me. "Why do you wish to fight for us?"

I looked him straight in the eye. He was a fairly big Nord, but I had taken down men twice his size. "I have a score to settle with the Imperial guard. But other than that, Skyrim is my home. I wish to fight for it."

"Well Ulfric, what do you think?" Galmar turned to the Jarl.

"We are always looking for the strong of spirit. Perhaps she'll be an asset," Ulfric said, contemplating my worth.

_An asset…Really? I killed the World-Eater and these imbeciles are debating on whether or not I was capable for a war. _Galmar looked me over. I was short, skinny and I knew I didn't look like much. Little did they know that what I lacked in brutal strength, I made up for in stealth. "If it's an issue on my prowess in battle, I assure you – "

"Perhaps the standard test then, Galmar?" Ulfric interrupted me.

Galmar grunted. "Perhaps." He scrutinized me. "I want you to go to the Serpentstone Island and kill an Ice Wraith."

I stared back at him. _Was he insane? _"An Ice Wraith?" I asked sceptically. "Do you realize that I travelled to Sovngarde and back to defeat Alduin?"

"That's not my concern. It is a test for those I'm not sure about. Will you do it or not?" He growled.

"Of course I will. I'll be back," I smiled optimistically.

"We shall see," he said pessimistically.

As I was about to leave, Ulfric spoke to me again. "Dragonborn have you eaten?"

I raised an eyebrow. "Um, yeah, sort of – "

"Great. Sit down," he ordered.

Grudgingly, I sat down on an empty chair across from where Jorleif was still eating his lunch. I watched as Ulfric got up off his throne and sat down in the chair beside me. He started grabbing a plate of food. "Help yourself," he said to me.

Strangely, I found myself really enjoying the sound of his voice. It was deep, but pleasant somehow. He glanced over at me, and kept his gaze on my face for a long time. I realized that he was trying to wear me down, and I wondered if he used this technique to win over the women he liked to bed.

I, on the other hand didn't get flustered quite so easily. "Is there something on my face my Jarl?" I asked politely. From how close he was to me, I really noticed how the war was written all over his face. He really was quite handsome; that thought sent a foreign feeling of butterflies into my stomach.

He smirked. "Were you born in Skyrim?"

"Yes Sir." I bit into a leg of chicken.

He narrowed his eyes. "Do you have a criminal past? Perhaps I've seen you on a Wanted Poster? You seem so familiar to me."

I laughed. "My secrets are my own Sir."

"Fair enough. But tell me Dragonborn, have we met before?" He asked irritably.

"Indeed we have," I gave him a teasing smile.

He raised an eyebrow. "And where may that have been?"

I sighed. "If I just simply tell you that will just raise more questions."

He grunted. "How about the whole story then?"

"As you wish Sir." I took a slow sip of water only to find myself being watched by three sets of expectant eyes. "I was born in Skyrim and lived here for many years. I've been through all sorts of hardship – "

Ulfric snorted. "What do _you _know about hardships? You're so young; twenty perhaps?" He snapped.

"Twenty-two," I muttered.

He glared at me. "You're still a baby; perhaps even a virgin."

I choked on the water I was drinking at that moment. _Don't use Unrelenting Force on Ulfric, don't do it, _I thought, trying to contain my anger. If it were any other man who had chided me they would have gotten a nice visit from my fist.

I swallowed back my rage and gave Ulfric a loaded smile. Galmar and Jorleif were watching our exchange with genuine interest. I knew they were wondering if I would be able to come back from this first blow. "I am much younger than you," I finally said. "But believe me; I have been through my fair share of suffering. Suffering you wouldn't understand."

"What would you know of my suffering?" His voice was full of acid.

"I know what happened with the Thalmor. Just as you, I know what it's like to feel the absence of hope. I know what it's like to think you're never going to live again. Believe me; I know more than you think I do." I said quietly.

He was silent for a while before saying, "You have done your research about me then?"

"Yes. I know about your life with the Greybeards. You were merely an adolescent when the Great War started in 4E 171. Now it's over thirty years later, so perhaps you'd be what, fifty?" I chided.

He glared at me, but said nothing. I shrugged. "Why guess your age? Why don't we just lift up your neck and count the rings like those botany researchers do with the trees?" I said sarcastically.

Galmar and Jorleif laughed quite loudly. I smirked at Ulfric, who gave me one of the iciest stares I had ever encountered. "Since you're in the mood to weave tales Dragonborn, perhaps you could tell me where we have met?" He growled over the chuckling of his comrades.

Galmar was still grinning, and Jorleif looked down into his mug of ale to try to contain himself. I gave Ulfric a half turn of my body. "In my late 19th year, I crossed the border to Cyrodiil to finish some business."

"What sort of business?" Galmar asked.

I shrugged. "Nothing of consequence. But needless to say, I ended up in prison. One day, I escaped in nothing but my prisoner robes."

"You escaped prison?" Ulfric asked sceptically. "Exactly what business were you in?"

I smiled, but chose to ignore his question. "I made my way to the Skyrim-Cyrodiil border, only to find that there was an ambush waiting for a certain Jarl." I stared right at Ulfric, and his eyes went wide in realization. "I was caught in the ruckus and somehow became unconscious. And, what do you think happened when I woke up?" I asked in mock surprise.

"I can only guess," Ulfric mumbled into a mug of water.

"Indeed. I woke up beside you, Ralof and a horse thief whose only desire was to bed me before his head was removed from his body," I snapped.

Ulfric frowned. "I remember that you threatened to cut off his balls."

I smirked. "It isn't wise to talk bad about the dead."

He sighed. "I didn't know that that was you. You looked quite different back on that day." He raked his eyes over my body, lingering on my breast for a few seconds.

_Do not use your Thu'um against him, _I chanted inside my head. "I had just escaped from prison," I snapped. "Pardon me if I didn't have the time to find a bathhouse."

He smiled. "I didn't mean it that way. You were beautiful then and you're even more breathtaking now," he said smoothly.

I snorted, unfazed. "Thanks."

"I seem to recall that you promised me two years ago that you would join my cause against the Empire."

_Was that a question? _"Yes, and I'm here to fulfil that promise."

"Why didn't you come to Windhelm as soon as you and Ralof escaped Helgen?" He accused.

"Are you daft?" I snapped. "As soon as I escaped Helgen, I found out that I was the fucking Dragonborn. Alduin was on the top of my list of priorities. I apologize that I had bigger things to worry about than your ridiculous war." I said sardonically.

"If my war is so ridiculous, why do you wish to fight for me?" He said, his voice rising to a fevering pitch.

I glared at him. "Because I made a promise to you."

"What?" He looked surprised.

"I don't believe in a lot of your policies, but I made a decision that day in Helgen to help you. I believe that I could be a good ally to you. It's your decision whether you will have me or not."

Ulfric exhaled sharply and exchanged glances with Galmar. The housecarl smiled knowingly. I raised an eyebrow at this, and when Ulfric turned his eyes onto me, I felt my stomach flip. _What just happened? _

"Dragonborn, perhaps..." He hesitated. "Perhaps I was too harsh."

My eyebrows flew up in surprise. "Oh?"

His eyes searched my face and I found myself staring back at him lost in his expression. _What's happening? Why can't I look away? _It was like he had some kind of hold on me. "You're a feisty woman," he remarked quietly.

I couldn't answer. _Where was he going with this? _"I don't usually do this," he started. "But I think for you, I could make an exception."

"Do what?" I asked reluctantly.

"I'd like you to become my mistress," he stated. My eyes went wide and I gaped at his face to determine whether he was kidding or not.

He wasn't.

"Of course," he continued, "if it's a question of coin, I have to tell you that you'll be compensated quite handsomely."

"You're serious?" I sputtered.

"Indeed, Dragonborn I am."

"Do you really think that I'd bed _you _just for some coin? I am no whore!" I yelled at him.

He raised an eyebrow. "I know you're not a whore. If I wanted a whore, I'd go out and get one. The arrangement I was thinking of would surely last more than one night."

I laughed bitterly. "I wouldn't bed you if you were the last man in Skyrim," I hissed.

It was obvious that he didn't expect to be rejected. He was so used to getting what he wanted. I was an obstacle that he didn't expect to get in his way. I stood up from the wooden chair and stared down at the fuming figure of the Jarl. "I wouldn't be your mistress any more than I'd be Galmar's," I retorted. "No offense Galmar."

Galmar held up his hands in defense. He was trying to contain his laughter at my rebuff of his friend. "Now, if you'll excuse me, _my Jarl_," I said his title with extreme malevolence. "I have an Ice Wraith to kill."

I turned on my heel and started to walk away. "Dragonborn!" Ulfric's voice thundered throughout the throne room. I stopped walking and gave him an annoyed half-turn. "Bring me the fucking teeth," he growled.

I gave him a scornful bow and stormed my way to the exit. The last thing I heard before I left the Palace was Galmar's laughter, and one phrase: "You have to admit Ulfric, she's a spit-fire!"

**_A/N:_**_My Dragonborn is nameless. In the game no one actually calls you by the name you gave at the beginning. It's all: "Dragonborn", "Dovahkiin", "Milady", "Lass" "You" etc. My characters were always named after myself, but in this she's remaining nameless. So I'm writing this because I fell in love with Ulfric Stormcloak. His history amazes me and I get so involved in the past of the NPC's in this game. It's my favourite game and Ulfric is one of my favourite NPC's._

_This was a long chapter and the next one is even longer. I spent forever reviewing this so hopefully there aren't any mistakes. If you should find any, please let me know._


	2. Chapter 2

II

It was almost a week before I returned to Windhelm to deliver the teeth of the Ice Wraith to Ulfric. I would have returned much earlier but I was detoured along the way by some bandits thirsting for blood.

I kept my expression composed as I walked into the Palace of the Kings. Ulfric was sitting on his throne, doing nothing as per usual for a Jarl. Jorleif and Ulfric both gave me equally surprised looks when I marched up to them.

"Dragonborn," Jorleif greeted with a smile.

I smiled back at him. Around my neck, I wore a leather pouch with the teeth in it. I took it off and threw it onto Ulfric's lap. Gingerly he opened it, and dumped the contents into his hand. "It seems that Galmar owes me a drink," he smiled. He turned the teeth over in his hands.

_What? _I would have thought with the way that I treated Ulfric last week, he would never have made a bet with Galmar on whether I would return. And it was even more troubling for me to find out that _Ulfric_ was the one who won. "Galmar, you'll want to see this!" He shouted towards the war-room.

A few seconds later, the large Nord appeared into the throne room. He looked me over again. "I didn't think she'd return," he commented, eyeing Ulfric.

"You sent me there to die, did you?" I huffed, putting my hands on my hips.

"No. It was a test of your mettle," Galmar explained gruffly. "What does it matter now? You've returned."

The two men both stared at me in silence. They clearly had no idea what to do with me. "She's passed your test Galmar despite your doubts," Ulfric finally said.

"Yes she has. You won the bet Ulfric."

Ulfric raised an eyebrow. "You still have doubts?"

"No, not really. I think she has quite a temper though, as we saw the last time she graced your halls," he smirked.

"If you want to continue being my second in command, you will _never _mention that fucking day to me again," Ulfric growled.

I crossed my arms over my chest. They were talking about me as if I wasn't even there. "Galmar, you told me last week that the mission you sent me on would be my initiation. Is there something else you'd like me to do? I'll do whatever it takes," I said stubbornly.

Galmar chuckled. "See Ulfric, I told you that she was a true daughter of Skyrim." He turned back to me. "I didn't think you'd come back Dragonborn. You're a small woman and you don't look like much. You need some meat on your bones, but I think I was wrong about you."

I smiled. "Thank you." I had been through this many times before. No one could believe that this small girl could possibly be called Dovahkiin. It allowed me to slip by unnoticed.

"Are you ready to let her in, Ulfric?"

The Jarl stared at me for a long moment before grunting. "Fine. Make her take the oath. We'll see if she can learn obedience."

I frowned, and Galmar stood in front of me. "Hold up your right hand." I did as he asked, and he started reading me the oath. Ulfric and I locked eyes; we stared at each other until I finished repeating everything Galmar had said. "I do swear my blood and honour to the service of Ulfric Stormcloak, Jarl of Windhelm and true High King of Skyrim. As Talos is my witness, may this oath bind me to death and beyond, even to my lord as to my fellow brothers and sisters in arms. All hail the Stormcloaks, the true sons and daughters of Skyrim!" I recited this with as much enthusiasm as I could muster. Ulfric smiled at me, looking relatively pleased that I was finally under his command. After my disobedience and ridicule of his manhood the week before, I was fairly certain that he would try to repay me any way he could. I was willing to take whatever he threw at me.

"Congratulations Dragonborn. From here on, you will be known as 'Unblooded'," Galmar said proudly.

"I'm ready for anything," I said.

"It happens that I have a mission for someone of your calibre."

"Oh?" I asked, raising an intrigued eyebrow.

Ulfric grunted. "Not _this _again."

"Ulfric…" Galmar frowned.

"Tell me again why we're wasting time and dwindling resources chasing a legend. We don't even know it exists!" Ulfric snapped.

"The Jarls are upset. They don't all support you," Galmar reasoned.

"Bah. Damn the Jarls."

"They demand the Moot."

"And damn the Moot!" Ulfric shouted. "We should risk letting those milkdrinkers put Torygg's woman on the throne? She'll hand Skyrim over to the elves on a silver plate."

"All the more reason then. The crown would legitimize your claim."

Ulfric snorted. "A crown doesn't make a king."

"No, but this one…"

"If it even exists."

"What crown are you talking about?" I asked.

They both ignored me. "It exists," Galmar said. "And it'll be the symbol of the righteousness of our cause. Think about it. The Jagged Crown!" He threw up his hands for emphasis. "It heralds back to a time before jarls and moots. Back to the time when a king was a king because his enemies fell before him, and his people rose because they loved him. Skyrim needs that king. _You _will be that king, Ulfric. You _must _be."

Ulfric seemed to be considering this. "You're certain you've found it?"

"When have I ever been false with you?" Galmar scoffed.

The Jarl frowned. "Fine," he snorted. "I'll send the Unblooded here with you." He turned to give me an ironic smirk. "Well Dragonborn, fancy crawling through a moldering dungeon to see if you can't stir up Galmar's Jagged Crown?"

"You bet," I smiled.

"It'll be there. You'll see." Galmar promised.

"Care to wager on it, then?" Ulfric raised an eyebrow. "Once you come back empty handed, you'll owe me a drink."

Galmar grinned cockily. "I won't come back empty handed."

"We shall see," Ulfric said leaning back onto his throne.

"Unblooded," Galmar addressed me finally. "We're heading to a Nordic Ruin called Korvanjund. Am I right to assume that you've dealt with Draugr before?"

I gave him a look to suggest how ridiculous his statement was. "Yes, I have."

"You will accompany me and a small group of my men to Korvanjund. The Imperials are certain to have found their way in. This is your chance to prove yourself, woman. We're departing within the hour."

(~~)

The Korvanjund ruins were similar to most other crypts I had been in. I picked up the Ebony Claw that was situated on the ground near a dead body, knowing that it would be our key to finding our way to the Jagged Crown.

Along the way, we dispatched many an Imperial soldier. Apparently, as Galmar explained, they were after the crown as well. There were many obstacles in our path, but luckily we never got hindered by any of them. Once we reached the large Nordic door near the end, I placed the claw in the keyhole. Slowly, the door came down, and Galmar and his men rushed passed me.

I didn't believe in this type of fighting style. I preferred to sneak up on my enemies so I couldn't get overwhelmed. I was surprised that none of them had gotten hurt by the way they ran into battle. Finally, we reached the end of the dungeon; it was a large room with a seemingly dead Draugr that sat on a throne.

"Look Sir, there's the crown!" A soldier yelled, pointing at the Draugr sitting on the throne. He started to advance towards it.

_Oh gods. _"Stop you fool!" I shouted.

All eyes were on me after my outburst; the soldier stopped immediately in his tracks. Galmar glared at me. "What's wrong Unblooded?"

"Do you see that Draugr?" I whispered. "It is a very powerful enemy. If your soldier went to grab the crown, the Draugr and all his little friends would wake up and surround him. It would have been a death sentence."

Galmar looked reluctant to admit that I was right. "Since you seem to have all the answers Dragonborn, what do you suggest I do?"

"Let me fight it alone."

"Why would I let you do that?"

I exhaled sharply. "Because I've fought this type of Draugr many times before. More than likely it will use a shout. It will probably be a weaker version of my Unrelenting Force, but I will be able to combat it with my own. I can defeat it. All you and your men need to do is back me up with the other Draugr."

Galmar considered this. "You have a problem with authority don't you?"

I gave him a half-smile. "Not usually. I just think your man would have gotten killed just rushing in like that. If you order your men to keep their weapons at the ready, I will fire a projectile at the Draugr to wake it up and do some significant damage."

"Very well Dragonborn, but if this doesn't work…I won't be able to protect you from Ulfric's wrath…Or mine for that matter."

"Understood," I replied with a frown. "Please order your men to stand behind me." The Stormcloak soldiers stood behind me and I focused all my energy into creating a massive fireball within my two hands. I threw it towards the Draugr and luckily it hit its mark. The Draugr groaned, waking up its minions along with it. "Now!" I yelled, rushing over to my enemy.

I grabbed my sword Dawnbreaker and swiped the Draugr, giving it some more of my flames. It shrieked as my sword struck its middle. "Fus...Ro Dah!" It shouted at me when it recovered. I felt myself knockback with the force of its Voice. _His Unrelenting Force is more powerful than I anticipated, _I thought irritated.

The Draugr stumbled over to me, wielding its powerful greatsword. It wanted to overpower me, and as it quickly swung its sword, I rolled under him deftly, taking a swipe at his legs.

Thankfully, I was wounding it. As it swung its sword at me I misjudged the distance between us, and the dull end of the blade hit my forehead, slicing my skin open. I screamed from the pain and held my forehead with my free hand. The cut would be deep; I would probably need stitches if I didn't bleed out first.

The Draugr sauntered over to me, flashing a sadistic smile and laughing manically. It swung its sword, and I quickly held up Dawnbreaker to stop it from wounding me further. I tried to overpower it, but the fact remained that I was just not strong enough. In a last ditched effort, I focused my power into my Voice. "Yol…Toor, Shul!" I shouted.

The Draugr caught on fire and I knew that it was close to death. I limped over to him, grabbed the Jagged Crown off of his head, and with the last of my energy, I stabbed the swine with a life-ending blow.

I fell to my knees with exhaustion. My forehead felt like it was on fire. "Unblooded!" Galmar knelt down to where I was seated and put a hand on my shoulder. "Are you okay?"

"I'm alive. That's all that matters." I let out a sharp hiss of pain. I looked around to the other soldiers. The Draugr were all dispatched and no one seemed to be hurt. My tactic had worked after all.

"Here, let me take a look at that wound," he said moving my chin over to look at him. He grimaced. "That is a deep cut. You need to get that treated as soon as we get to Windhelm. Although I'm not sure that it'll last that long."

I bit my lip, dreading the quick decision I just made. "Hand me a torch will you?"

Galmar handed me a torch and I took out one of my hidden daggers from my boot. I stuck it into the fire until the blade burned orange. With a deep breath I held the blade against my forehead to staunch the bleeding. I screamed immediately when it touched my skin. With some unknown strength, I somehow held it on my flesh long enough to cauterize the wound.

Tears fell down my face when I threw the dagger on the ground. "Dragonborn…You are one brave woman," Galmar commented in awe.

"Not…Not really," I replied once I found my voice again. "The first time I had to do that, I fainted." I rifled through my bag to find some clean white strips. I wrapped one around my forehead to protect the cut. Alongside the bandages, I found a potion for fever inside the bag and I took a swig of that. "Here's the crown," I said to Galmar, wiping away the tears from my face.

"You should be the one to give it to Ulfric. You earned that right Dragonborn," he said, handing it back to me.

"Thank you," I nodded. "We should get going. There's most likely a back entrance."

As we were leaving I could hear low, powerful whispers; they were something that only I could hear. They were whispers from a Word Wall. In my weakened state, I advanced to it and I felt an intense energy passing through my body. I smiled a little as the ethereal light flew into me. "Slow Time," I whispered, opening my eyes.

I turned to my comrades, who were all gawking at me. Apparently, no one expected to see the Dragonborn in action. "Uh, shall we go?" I mumbled, crossing my arms over my chest.

"Come on men, the show is over," Galmar barked.

(~~)

The road back to Windhelm was very taxing on my body. Shadowmere held me up most of the ride back because my head was pounding. Galmar kept on stealing glances towards me to make sure I hadn't fainted.

Once we got into the city, I told Galmar to go on ahead to the Palace of the Kings without me. I had to go to sell some things at the local shops.

(~~)

I hobbled my way back to the Palace, holding my forehead the entire time. When I got inside, Ulfric and Galmar were in a deep discussion. I knew I looked like an absolute mess; Ulfric's eyes going wide solidified that theory. "I believe you owe Galmar a drink," I said smartly to Ulfric handing him the crown.

"By the Gods," Ulfric whispered. "I can't believe I hold the Jagged Crown in my hands." He stared at it in awe and then smirked. "Galmar, you've won our bet." He handed Galmar the crown and then brought his eyes back over to my face. "Dragonborn, sit at the table," he commanded.

I did as he asked, and he joined me on the chair next to me. "Take off the bandage," he said.

"Uh, it's okay. I'm going to go get Quintus Navale to look at it later," I mumbled.

"Dragonborn, this wasn't a request." Ulfric threatened. "Take off the bandage or I'm going to do it for you."

I sighed and slowly unwrapped the linen from my forehead. Ulfric grimaced. "This is going to need stitches."

I frowned at this. "Oh. My Jarl, I – "

He interrupted me. "Jorleif. Go find that Alchemist…"

"Quintus Navale," I reminded him.

"Bring Quintus here and tell him to bring his equipment. It's urgent." Jorleif rushed out of the castle at Ulfric's orders. "Galmar, bring me a basin of water and clean cloths."

I squinted. "Sir, what're you – "

He sighed irritably. "You have blood all over your face Dragonborn. I need to clean it." He gave me a hard glance. "And call me Ulfric."

"Are you sure?" I raised an eyebrow, only to wince from the pain.

He grunted. "You're the Dragonborn are you not? I will permit you to call me by my given name because of that."

"Alright…Ulfric," I said.

He smiled as if the sound of his name on my tongue pleased him. Galmar returned moments later with the water basin. "Try to stay still," Ulfric ordered me. He dipped the cloth in the water and gently started to clean the dried blood off of my face. For some reason, my cheeks flushed when I felt his fingers touch my skin. "Galmar told me that you cauterized the wound yourself," he said conversationally.

"Yes Sir…I mean, Ulfric," I mumbled.

"I know many men who could never accomplish such an act of bravery." He was working as close to the wound as he could get.

"I don't see it as bravery. I only do what I need to to survive."

He stopped wiping my face to gaze at me. I couldn't read the expression in his eyes. "You and I have more in common than I would have ever thought possible."

I felt those obnoxious butterflies deep in my stomach again. _What was wrong with me? _"Have you cleaned many wounds?" I asked.

He nodded. "More than my fair share. I've had to stitch a lot of my own by hand. One does much in dire circumstances." He said bitterly.

Before I could answer, the castle doors flew open and Jorleif entered with Quintus. "Oh hello Dragonborn! It's a pleasure to see you again," the Imperial smiled at me.

"Well met Quintus." I said.

"Did you bring the tools?" Ulfric asked.

"Yes my Jarl, I did." Quintus took out a dark coloured potion from his alchemy bag. "This potion will disinfect the wound and numb it so it can be stitched. It won't be pleasant Dragonborn…" He hesitated. "It will hurt worse than the hot blade you used on your forehead."

I shrunk back away from him. He took a clean cloth and drenched it in the potion. "No I think I'll be okay," I mumbled.

Quintus sighed. "Dragonborn, that's going to start to fester. You don't want that do you?"

I didn't answer. As he came closer to my face with the medicine, I felt my heart pound. In fear, I grabbed something close to me for grip. When the cloth touched my skin, I felt it start to singe. My flesh felt like it was boiling at the surface. I screamed louder than I think I ever had in my life.

The seconds dragged on like hours. Finally, the pain started to subside. My eyes flew open and I had to choke back a sob. What would these men think of me if I started crying around them? "Is it starting to go numb yet?" Quintus asked apologetically.

I nodded, knowing I couldn't bring myself to speak while I was on the verge of tears. Quintus gathered a needle and thread to stitch up my wound. Instantly, I recoiled away from him.

Ulfric grabbed the Alchemist's hand to stop him. "I'll do it," he said firmly.

Quintus raised an eyebrow. "My Jarl, I am trained for this type of thing – "

"I've stitched up more wounds than you have in your lifetime," he interrupted. "And you've hurt her enough already don't you think?" He glared at the Imperial.

Quintus frowned. "Alright. Make sure she rubs this disinfectant on the wound each morning. She'll have to come see me in a week so the stitches can come out."

"Fine," Ulfric snapped.

"Just make sure that the stitches aren't too far apart and – "

"Out!" Ulfric barked.

Quintus bowed and scurried off. "The rest of you," Ulfric addressed Jorleif and Galmar. "Leave us."

The Steward and the housecarl left the throne room, leaving us alone. "You can let go of my hand now Dragonborn. You won't feel any more pain," he said quietly.

I looked down to what I was still gripping. I hadn't noticed, but I had accidentally grabbed his hand. I released him immediately. "Talos…I'm so sorry," I whispered. My voice cracked in the middle of the sentence.

He smiled at me; for once his eyes were kind. "I hadn't realized how strong you were. You almost broke my hand."

I laughed a little through my tears. "If I wanted to break your hand, you would know it."

He grinned, picking up the needle and thread. I winced at this sight. "Dragonborn," he said, putting his free hand on my cheek to cup it. "I won't hurt you. You have my word."

My cheeks heated up under his touch and for some reason I believed him. I nodded. _Why did trusting him come easier to me than the trust of anyone else? _"Here, move your chair closer to me," he said.

Without waiting for a confirmation, he dragged my chair as close to his as the space would allow. Our legs were touching and in that simple moment - I wasn't sure why - I felt a strange sense of desire pool into my belly. I flushed at the thought. No man had ever roused _any_ feelings in me. So why should the most arrogant Jarl I had ever met in my life have such an unexpected impact on me?

"Tell me Dragonborn, why do you not have a housecarl to protect you?" He said, interrupting my thoughts. I hadn't realized that he had started stitching my cut.

"I had three," I said.

He looked surprised. "Which holds are you Thane of?"

"Whiterun was the first, Markarth was the second and Morthal was the third."

"And you were granted housecarls for each, correct?"

"Yes."

"So where are they all now?"

I sighed. "It's a long story."

"There's time Dragonborn," he said. I could feel his hot breath on my forehead. He smelt like some kind of spice; I couldn't put my finger on it. It was making me dizzy.

"Alright," I said. _I need a distraction anyways. _"My first housecarl was a woman named Lydia. I became Thane after I helped the Whiterun guard kill a dragon…And you know…Found out I was Dragonborn." He nodded, urging me to continue. "So anyways, Lydia was my first housecarl. She was a lovely woman and a good friend to me." I sighed. "She died by the hands of a Draugr. We didn't know each other that long, but I always treated her as a friend, not a servant. I think she appreciated that.

"I brought her body back to Whiterun and I paid for the burial myself. She must be in Sovngarde now…Although I never encountered her when I was there."

"And the next?" Ulfric asked. His eyes were focusing on my wound and what he was doing with it.

"In Markarth, a man named Argis the Bulwark assisted me. He and I were together a long time. He was a very tough warrior. He protected me from many foes that were too big for a small woman like me to handle," I laughed. "Anyways, he stuck by me through the whole Alduin crisis. We were good friends."

"Did he die as well?" He asked. He seemed genuinely interested.

"No. He never told me, but the night before I captured Odahviing in Dragonsreach, I caught him writing letters to a woman in Markarth. I asked him who the woman was and he told me that she was his fiancée. I laughed and asked him why he never mentioned her before. He told me that it didn't matter because he had sworn an oath to protect me.

"I told him that he was ridiculous. He should have told me about her."

"Why should he have done that?"

I smiled. "Because I would have never let him risk his life for me otherwise. He told me that he would follow me wherever I went and insisted that he stayed with me. I relented and told him that as soon as the Alduin crisis was over, he would be released from my service to go marry the girl.

"After I came back from Sovngarde, Argis and I met his fiancée in Riften and they were married. I stood up for him at their wedding."

Ulfric's face looked sceptical. "You let him go so he could marry?"

"Yes, what's wrong with that?"

"Nothing, I suppose. It just seems a little trivial."

I snorted. "You would think that wouldn't you? No need to worry about marriage. You've probably got hundreds of woman locked up ready and willing to fulfil your wildest fantasies."

He didn't smile; he just focused on my wound. "All but one," he said evenly.

I flushed. _Was he talking about me? _"Tell me about the third Dragonborn," he said when I was silent for a while.

"Oh, yeah…Sure. Um, I became Thane of Morthal when I helped them with a vampire problem. This was long after I was in Solstheim dealing with Miraak. It was a couple months ago actually. Anyways, that's when Valdimar showed up. He was a fairly decent Nord sorcerer. As I did with the others, he was treated as a friend and a travelling companion. But things seemed different…"

"What do you mean?"

I bit my bottom lip. "He seemed to be more invested into protecting me than the others were. He would make me stand back while he dealt with the enemy. Often I refused, because when he got swarmed I would have to come in and start fighting anyways."

"It sounds like he was fond of you," Ulfric commented.

"That was just it. He…He was in love with me," I sighed.

Ulfric made eye contact with me now. "Did you love him back?"

"Not the way that he loved me. I loved him as I would love a shield-brother or a friend. I was fond of him…But not in the way that he wanted me to be."

"How did you find out how he felt about you?"

"He…Well, we were camped out in the wilderness of Skyrim one night and he came over to sit beside me. He asked me if I ever thought about the future. I told him no because my future was unpredictable and I could die at any moment. He asked if I ever thought about marriage, comfort and safety. I said no. That was when he told me that he loved me. He said he could protect me and keep me safe. There was nothing that he wanted more than to be by my side."

"What did you say?"

"I told him I couldn't. It wouldn't be fair if I married him without the love reciprocating on my part. He was silent for a long time, but he smiled at me and said that he'd still stick by me and protect me with his life.

"That was the end of that discussion. Weeks later, I was on a mission for…Um, someone in this Falmer infested cave. We got to the end of the cave to get the item that was rumoured to be there. We were both surrounded by enemies. I dispatched mine quickly, but Valdimar was having trouble. He was strong but he wasn't as quick as me. One of them stabbed him in the stomach. He fell to his knees. I extinguished the Falmer that had wounded him and came over to his side."

My eyes welled up with tears now at the memory. "I knew he was dying. There wasn't anything I could do to save him. He asked me if I would bring his body back to Morthal to be buried. I told him I would do it and then to give him some peace, I kissed him.

"He smiled at me and then it was over. I found an alternate exit out of the cave, so I carried his body out of there. It was a struggle, but once I got outside, I made a stretcher out of branches. Shadowmere and I dragged his body back to Morthal. Once I got there, I refused to let the gravedigger do it. I dug his grave and buried him myself. I cried the entire time. I miss him," I mumbled.

"I'm sorry you had to go through that," Ulfric said sympathetically.

"Yeah. Well, I got back to Riften and gave the woman her item I had to find. She yelled at me, asking where I had been and why I took so long. I punched her squarely in the jaw. The blow was so hard I knocked her down to the ground. I said to her, 'I had to bury my housecarl you bitch.' She came to apologize to me afterwards and now we are still good friends." I smiled. I had been on a little errand for the Thieves Guild. Vex had sent me out to find the Crown of Barenziah in this ridiculously deep cave. All in all though, Vex sure had her temper but she was relatively harmless.

Ulfric looked at me. "Your wound is stitched up."

"Is it? Thank you. I appreciate what you've done for me."

He ran a thumb along the long scar on my left cheek. "Who gave you this?"

I reddened. "Uh, just some Imperials. They're all dead now."

He nodded, seeming pleased by that affirmation. "This fresh one is going to leave quite the scar."

I shrugged. "Maybe the men will stay away from me now."

"I doubt that," he said with a smile. "Your beauty is a very rare thing."

We locked eyes at that moment and I flushed. "Um, Ulfric?" I asked.

"Yes?" His fingers deftly moved a few stray locks of hair from my forehead.

"Why did you decide to stitch me up?"

"What do you mean?" He raised an eyebrow.

I sighed. "You're the Jarl of Windhelm. Why should you decide to fix my wounds when a healer could have done it themselves?"

He seemed surprised at my question. "Dragonborn…You were injured. You were injured because of my doing. What did you expect me to do?"

I frowned. "So, let me get this straight…Any man that got hurt in that assault could come up to you and you would stitch their wounds for them?"

He didn't answer me. I knew I had stumped him and for once he had no response. "I didn't think so," I whispered. "But please…Tell me why you decided to fix me."

He exhaled sharply. "Dragonborn, have you always been this insolent?"

I smiled. "For the better part of my youth, yes."

He grimaced and I wasn't sure that he would answer my question. "I wanted to fix you because you remind me fiercely of myself at your age." He said firmly.

I looked at him in surprise. "Ulfric…"

He shrugged. "It matters not."

Normally I would have pressed him on the issue, but today I thought I'd keep my mouth shut for once. "Is there any water around here?" I asked.

He looked around the table for water pitchers. "Jorleif!" He yelled when he realized that they were all empty.

The Steward swiftly walked out of the war-room. I wondered if he and Galmar had heard our conversation. "Yes my Jarl?"

"Get the Dragonborn water, would you?"

Jorleif nodded and departed to go to the kitchen. "You could treat others better you know," I commented when he had left.

"What?" Ulfric scowled.

"You treat others as if they mean nothing to you. You threw out Quintus even though he was trying to help me – "

"Do you forget that his concoction made you cry?" He snarled.

I paled. "Uh, well no, but you could treat your servants and citizens as friends instead of your slaves."

He glowered down at me. He was even taller than me when we were sitting down. "I pay these men and women well."

"That doesn't mean that they deserve the treatment you give them. You'd be a better Jarl for it," I retorted.

After that statement, I had a feeling that I had crossed the line. Sometimes I just couldn't keep my mouth shut. "Dragonborn," his breath came out in a hiss. "You would be advised to bite your tongue."

I looked down into my lap. "I apologize for overstepping my bounds. I find that once I become passionate about something, I cannot give it up. Please forgive me."

He turned his eyes onto me, assessing me for a long time. Eventually, he brought my chin up with his thumb. "Dragonborn…" he hesitated.

"Yes?" My heart fluttered. _By Ysmir, why was I being affected by him so much? _

At that moment, Jorleif came into the throne room, interrupting us. Ulfric cleared his throat and dropped his hand from my face. I had a feeling that I would never know what he wanted to say to me. "Jorleif," Ulfric started. I poured myself some water and drank swiftly to quench my thirst.

"Yes milord?"

"Thank you for the water," he mumbled.

Jorleif nodded. "You're welcome Sir."

I gave Ulfric an appreciative smile. "Jorleif," I said turning to the Steward. "I was wondering…"

"Yes milady?"

"You know that house that Calixto was using for his twisted rituals? The large one…Oh what was it called…" I placed my fingers on my temples to try to remember.

"Hjerim," he said.

"Yes, that house. Has anyone purchased it yet?"

"Well, no," he admitted. "People seem reluctant to purchase a house that has been defiled with the dark arts."

"Could I buy it?"

His eyes went wide. "You want it?"

"Yes. I think," I locked eyes with Ulfric, "I'm going to be in Windhelm for a while. It'll be nice to own a house."

Jorleif looked at the Jarl. "Should I sell it to her?"

Ulfric rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "I only permit foreigners to buy property if they are Thane of my hold."

My face fell. "Oh, okay," I mumbled.

"But since you extricated the man who was murdering the women of my city, I don't see why you can't purchase the house," he relented.

I grinned at him. "Really? Thank you Ulfric." The Jarl smiled back at me.

"How does 8,000G sound for it?" Jorleif asked, seemingly ignoring the exchange between us. "If you can't afford that, I'm sure some sort of payment can be arranged."

"No," I said. "The money won't be a problem."

Jorleif raised an eyebrow but decided not to question me on where I could obtain such a sum of money. "Has the place been cleaned?" Ulfric asked Jorleif.

"Er…Not that I'm aware of Sir. I'm afraid all the bones are still there." He gave me an apologetic look. "If you want you can stay here why I order it to be cleaned out. It shouldn't take but a day."

"No that's alright. I'll clean it myself," I stated.

He nodded. "Here's the key Dragonborn." Jorleif handed me a small key from his waistband.

I stared at the metal key and smiled. "How amusing. I didn't use a key the first time I went in there."

Ulfric and Jorleif exchanged glances. "Exactly what do you mean by that?" Ulfric asked.

I winked at him and chose to ignore his question. "Thank you again for stitching me up. Your generosity will not be forgotten." I grabbed my bag and walked out of the Palace of the Kings, enjoying the dumbfound expression the Jarl and his Steward had for me when I turned around.

_Disclaimer: Skyrim and all its characters belong to Bethesda. The Stormcloak oath was NOT written by me. It is a direct quote from the game and the strategy guide._

_The discussion between Ulfric and Galmar about the Jagged Crown is directly quoted from the game. **It starts with Ulfric saying: "Tell me again why we're wasting time and dwindling resources chasing a legend. We don't even know it exists!" and ends with Galmar saying: "It'll be there. You'll see."** I added a lot of embellishments to this quote though, but I needed to make it clear that it wasn't mine; I just added to it._


	3. Chapter 3

III

Hjerim, as I had imagined was absolutely disgusting inside. I almost wished that I had taken Jorleif up on his offer to clean the place. Not only did I have to deal with the creepy ritualistic bones in the secret room, I had to air out the entire place so the dust and the nasty smell could go away. With this cold weather, I didn't think that it would take too long for the stench to cease.

I inspected the fireplaces in all the rooms to determine if they were safe, and I started up a fire in the main room. My first order of business would be to furnish my bedroom. I was tired of sleeping on bedrolls and I wanted the few bathrooms in my house to be well equipped.

I worked diligently on cleaning the house from top to bottom. My head was pounding from the wound I had, but it was something I tried my best to ignore. Cleaning Hjerim took priority over my health. Hours later, when I ended up in the secret ritual room, I knew it was going to be a challenge. The blood was all dried up and the bones were turning yellow from age. I crinkled my nose in disgust and decided I needed to go furniture shopping instead. Perhaps Jorleif would know where I could buy some good pieces.

A loud banging on my door knocker brought me out of my reverie. When I answered it, I saw Jorleif followed by a taller and stronger Nord warrior. "Hello again Jorleif. Please come in."

The two men came inside my house and looked around. "Dragonborn, you've been quite busy in here," Jorleif smiled.

"Thanks," I said, wiping my forehead. "It's been a very daunting task."

He nodded. "This brings me to my reason for being here. This is Calder," he pointed to the warrior beside him.

"It's nice to meet you Calder." I held out my hand for him to shake. He smiled warmly at me.

"Lord Ulfric has generously appointed Calder to be your housecarl," Jorleif explained.

I stared at him blankly. "Housecarl? I'm not even Thane of the city!"

Jorleif shrugged. "That doesn't seem to matter to the Jarl. He has decided you are to have a housecarl; someone to protect you."

I looked down to the ground. Why would Ulfric hire a housecarl for me? Is that why he was so interested in my story from this morning? "Thank Ulfric for me, but I'll be by tomorrow to properly thank him myself."

Jorleif nodded. "I will pass that along. If there's nothing else Dragonborn, I shall take my leave."

"Oh wait, actually there is something. Do you know where I can find furniture?" I wondered.

The Steward gave me a coy smile. "You wish to furnish the whole house?"

"Yes."

"I'll see what I can do. I can acquire a few necessities for you now."

"Thank you Jorleif. I appreciate it."

Once Jorleif took his leave, I turned to look up at Calder. He was at least a foot taller than me, and much larger. "I'm quite grateful for your service."

Calder nodded. "It's a pleasure milady. Is there anything you need me to do?"

"Well, I guess you could help me clean up the creepy blood ritual room," I smiled. "I hope you have a strong stomach."

He grinned. "I do milady. Shall we get started?"

Calder and I started to gather the bones into a pile so we could clean up the blood. Later I planned to deliver the bones to Windhelm's Hall of the Dead so they could finally be put to rest. With a couple of buckets of water in tow and clean cloths we got down on our knees to purify the room.

"Calder, can I ask you something?" I wondered after a while of silence.

"Of course milady. I'm here to do your bidding." He replied.

I frowned. "Calder, you are certainly _not_ here to do my bidding. I'm not certain what Ulfric told you, but I'm not looking for a housecarl," I said.

"What do you mean?" He asked confusedly.

"I treat my followers as friends, as companions to share my journey with. All I want is friendship from you. I want you to be my housecarl because _you _want to, not because someone _hired _you to do so."

Calder raised an eyebrow. "The Jarl said you were different."

I laughed. "I see you've been subjected to Ulfric's charm. So, are you willing to try out a friendship?"

He smirked. "It would be an honour to be housecarl to you milady. Lord Ulfric said I'd like you. You really are a spit-fire."

I smiled. Those were Galmar's exact words when I stormed out of the Palace of the Kings. "Thank you Calder. You shan't be disappointed."

He chuckled. "You really are strange. Usually it's the other way around. I'm supposed to be afraid of disappointment from you, considering you're the Dragonborn and all."

I shrugged. "I don't like having servants. You and I shall work as a team."

He nodded. "Indeed we shall milady."

"Now back to my question. What exactly did Ulfric say to you?"

"What do you mean?"

"When he hired you, did he say why? Please, tell me everything."

He rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "I was summoned from the barracks a couple of hours ago. I was surprised when Jorleif brought me in front of the throne of Jarl Ulfric. He looked me over and said, 'Your name is Calder, correct?' I nodded and he said, 'I have noticed that you are a very capable warrior. Because of this, you have been chosen for a very important task.' When I asked him what it was, he said, 'I wish you to leave the barracks and become housecarl for the Dragonborn.'

"I have to admit, I was shocked. I had never met the Dragonborn, plus I had no idea whether you were male or female. I had boldly asked him who you were to him and he responded by saying, 'She is very important to my cause. She must not die. You must protect her from anything that comes in her way even if that means death for you.'"

I gave him a wide eyed look. "Go on."

"Well I said I would do it because it would be an honour to serve the Dragonborn. He promised me that he would pay me ten times what I was making as a guard. He told me you probably wouldn't agree to have a protector, but I was to ignore your will. He said that you were quite a different person; stubborn but pure-hearted.

"Anyways, as I was about to leave to pack my stuff up in the barracks, he stopped me. 'One more thing,' he said. 'You will not fall in love with her and you will not touch her. Is that clear?' I agreed willingly, although it was quite the strange request."

I clenched my fist. "Oh that…That arrogant bastard!" I yelled. "Why the fuck would he say that to you?"

Calder shrugged. "I assumed you were his woman."

I snorted. "I am not his! He may be the leader of the Rebellion, but he's a vile, oversexed…Hagraven! Damn him to Oblivion!"

My housecarl laughed. "I get the inclination that the feeling isn't mutual between you two."

I frowned. "I don't know why he wants you to protect me, but believe me he has no feelings towards me. He wants a submissive to bed, that's all."

"Either way, I found it to be a strange request. But please don't worry; I will abide by his wishes. I wouldn't have done so anyways even if he didn't suggest it."

I sighed. "Calder, even if you did try to touch me, I'd cut off your hand."

He chuckled. "You're quite tough as well. It'll be a pleasure serving you."

"I'm glad you think so."

(~~)

Calder and I cleaned up the entire secret room and within the next hour it was blood free. We took the bones to the Hall of the Dead and stopped by Candlehearth Hall for dinner. We stayed at the Inn for a long time that night, and when we got back to Hjerim, I was surprised by what I found.

There was furniture inside my house. "Calder, what is this?"

"I have no idea milady. I know nothing about this," he said quietly.

Jorleif had obviously purchased the necessities I needed, and apparently broke into my house when we were gone. The upstairs had a large spacious bed in my bedroom, a wash basin, a bookshelf and a storage trunk. He purchased a tub for me and another wash basin. It was simple enough until I decided to furnish the place even more.

I went back downstairs and found a large bedroom for Calder. "Well, it seems Jorleif pulled out all the stops. We'll have to get you a door for that room," I smiled at him.

He shrugged. "It's better than the guard barracks. This place is much warmer too." He was starting a fire in the fireplace.

"I'm going to go start a nice fire in my bedroom and read for a while. Goodnight Calder. Tomorrow we are going to see Ulfric."

(~~)

The next day, after I slept in for once, Calder and I went to the Palace of the Kings. Ulfric was sitting on his throne looking quite bored. Honestly, I had no idea what he did all day. "Can I talk to you alone?" I asked, boldly marching up to him.

He raised an annoyed eyebrow. "No 'good morning Ulfric'?"

"Good morning Ulfric," I huffed, crossing my arms over my chest.

He smirked. "That's better. Now, you wish to speak to me?" He seemed amused.

"Yes. Can we go somewhere private?" I asked impatiently.

He rubbed his rough beard thoughtfully. "You're quite demanding this morning Dragonborn. But, I suppose we must converse. Follow me, if you will." He got up off of the throne, and started walking towards the war room.

"I'll be back Calder. I trust you can entertain yourself," I smiled.

He grinned. "That I can milady."

"Well Dragonborn, are you following me or not?" Ulfric asked irritably.

I followed him into the war-room where Galmar and Yrsarald Thrice-Pierced were pouring over the Stormcloak maps. They took no notice of us and we went through the door to what I assumed was the upstairs.

"Where are we going Ulfric?" I asked, as we walked up the stairs.

"To my chambers," he replied.

"Oh really?" I said dryly. "If you try anything Ulfric Stormcloak, I swear to the Gods – "

"I wouldn't dream of it," he interrupted.

I sighed and followed him up the long second flight of stairs to his bedroom. "Why so many stairs?" I questioned, annoyed.

"Do you not have the endurance Dragonborn?" He asked, turning to me. I looked up at him and I realized he was teasing me.

"Perhaps not," I smiled.

He led me up to his bedroom, and closed the door behind us. Along with a sturdy lock on the door, there was a heavy metal door bar that he had propped up against the wall. "We shan't be disturbed here." He leaned against the door and observed me carefully.

I decided to have a look around. The first thing I noticed was the giant bed in the middle of his room. A set of four steps led up to it, making it the central piece of furniture in the entire room. He had very little in the way of objects in there. There were a few bookshelves, with seemingly random items placed on them.

There was a balcony off to the side of the large fireplace behind his bed. Except for a few doors which I assumed was his closet and facilities, the place was relatively empty.

"Why is your bed the focal point of the room? Is this a symbol of power for you? Does it help you assert your power over your bedmates?" I ran my hand along the bed sheets.

He smiled. "Something like that."

I flopped down on the bed. "Oh and it's comfortable too."

He slowly walked over to the other side of the bed and sat down beside me. He kept his distance. "Do you mean to tease me Dragonborn?" He cocked his head.

I shrugged. "You brought me up here."

"Ah, that I did. Now what did you want to speak to me about?" He changed the subject.

"This housecarl you hired for me..." I hesitated.

"Has he displeased you already?"

"Oh no, of course not. I'm fond of him. I just…I'd like to know why you hired him for me. I'm not even Thane of your city."

"Would you like to be?" He said seriously.

"What?" I asked surprised. "No…I'm just curious why you would do such a thing for a total stranger."

He smiled warmly at me. "You are more than a stranger Dragonborn." He lightly moved my hair away from my forehead. That simple action made my cheeks flush. "This wound of yours seems to be doing well. Is it paining you?"

"N-not really. I can handle it."

He chuckled. "What a stubborn woman you are. It's been a long time since I met someone as challenging as you."

I sighed. "Ulfric, you changed the subject on me."

"Ah, you noticed did you? I haven't given you enough credit."

"Ulfric," I frowned.

"Fine, fine. You win Dragonborn. I do have one condition though. You must answer one of my questions."

I bit my lip. "That depends on what you wish to know."

"I simply want to know what you meant about not using a key the first time you visited Hjerim."

I laughed. "Oh that."

"Well?" He pressed.

"Obviously I broke in."

He looked at me sceptically. "That house was equipped with an impenetrable lock."

I smirked. "Impenetrable was it? Not for me."

"And how did you avoid the guards?"

"A lot of practice." When he was silent for a while, I scoffed. "What, do you want to arrest me now?"

He exhaled sharply. "I suppose not."

"Ulfric, do you realize that the Thieves Guild is established in your city?"

He scowled. "Yes, I've been made aware. You wouldn't have anything to do with that would you?" He asked coldly.

"Perhaps. What does it matter now? I'm here to help you Ulfric, not hinder you. If you don't want me, I can leave the city."

He rubbed his face in his hands. "That is not what I want."

"Well, then you're going to have to forget the things I have done in the past."

"I know nothing of your past Dragonborn. You are quite secretive."

"I have to be," I sniffed.

"You don't trust many people." I wasn't certain if it was a question or not, but the expression on his face was one of pity.

"I have plenty of reasons to distrust most. The trait does not come easily to me. Although now people choose not to cross me now, knowing what I can do."

Ulfric frowned. "Will you tell me the truth of your past someday?"

"I don't know. That all depends on whether I can trust you not to throw me in jail or not." I looked down in my hands. Why did I feel so vulnerable? "Ulfric, I answered your questions thoroughly. Please answer mine." I whispered.

He exhaled sharply. "I hired Calder because I feel you need protecting. You are essential to my cause. I can't have you dying on me when I need you."

I reddened. "You…You need me?"

"I do Dragonborn. You've proven yourself to Galmar and more importantly, to me. I have a good feeling about you. My judgement is rarely false."

"I don't know what to say Ulfric." It had been a long time since anyone had praised me.

"Just don't prove me wrong Dragonborn."

I smiled. "I'll try my best."

"Actually, there's something that I'd like you to do for me," he started.

"Name it."

"Dragonborn, if you're not up to it tell me. I'd rather you rested your wounds then strain yourself."

I sighed. "Ulfric, after everything you've done for me, I owe you. So ask your damn favour."

He chuckled. "I need you to go to Whiterun."

"For what?"

He handed me a war-axe. "I need you to deliver a message to Balgruuf. It's time for him to pick a side in the war."

I frowned. "Is this axe the message?"

He sighed impatiently. "How long have you been in Skyrim? Yes, give him my axe. If Balgruuf should keep it, then we have a powerful ally against the Empire. But if he returns it…" He trailed off.

"Then you go to war." I whispered.

"Precisely. I hope to avoid bloodshed, but if Balgruuf doesn't cooperate, what else am I to do?"

I stared at him. He seemed to be stressed out. "There has to be another way."

"No Dragonborn, there isn't. Do not advise on matters you know nothing about," he warned.

I glared at him. "You think I'm incompetent don't you?"

"No. But I think you're young, and with youth comes naivety."

I snorted and got up off the bed. "How _dare_ you insult me like that Ulfric. You have no idea what I've been through! The things I've seen would make you quiver with fear!"

"Dragonborn," he started.

"Forget it!" I snapped. "I'm off to Whiterun." I stormed out of his bedroom and loudly made my way down to the throne room. As I stomped my way down the stairs, I could hear him following closely behind me. When I entered the throne room, I found Calder eating at the table with Jorleif. He looked up and frowned at my angry expression.

"Milady, are you alright?" Calder asked.

"Indeed. But you and I have to be off to Whiterun immediately. We must depart within the hour."

Ulfric went back to his throne. He apparently had nothing to say to me at that point, so Calder and I left. "What happened? Did he…Did he try something?" He whispered, as the large doors closed behind us.

"No, he didn't. Actually he told me I was young and therefore knew nothing of war, or the world." I hissed.

Calder smirked. "He's going to regret the day that he crossed you, isn't he?"

I laughed bitterly. "Yes, I suppose he is. I explain everything on the way. Now we must go to Hjerim to pack. I hope you have a horse Calder because we must get to Whiterun quickly."


	4. Chapter 4

IV

The mission to Whiterun wasn't what I had hoped it would be. Balgruuf returned Ulfric's war-axe and had a few aggressive words for me as well. I left Whiterun feeling particularly dejected. I wished that we could have had a peaceful resolution, but it seemed that Ulfric would get his war after all. "Calder, I have a feeling that this is what Ulfric hoped for. He told me that he wanted to avoid bloodshed, but I think in the long run he wants to teach the Empire a lesson," I said to my housecarl as we left the city.

Calder sighed. "I think you may be right milady. This might be a particularly nasty battle for Skyrim."

"How can I stand for this Calder? I'm supposed to be Thane of this hold! These are my people and we are going to march in and destroy this beautiful city. I feel like I've not only betrayed Balgruuf, but my friends here as well." Strangely, I felt compelled to trust my housecarl. He was already a good friend to me and we hadn't even been together that long. It had been a long time since I was able to let my feelings out to anyone and as it turned out, he was a good listener.

"Do you regret joining the Stormcloaks?"

"Yes and no. I made a promise to Ulfric a long time ago, but this is not what I signed up for. I can only hope that Balgruuf evacuates the city."

"No innocent deserves to be caught up in the middle of this. I hope this goes smoothly."

"Me too Calder. Me too."

(~~)

When we got back to Windhelm a day or so later, we dropped off our stuff at Hjerim. I cleaned myself up and we set off to the Palace. The snow today was pretty heavy; it was blowing around the city vapidly, seemingly increasing in strength as we tried to walk to Ulfric's palace. It chilled me to the bone, but Calder seemed used to the Windhelm weather.

The Palace was empty when we dragged our exhausted bodies in there, except for Ulfric and Jorleif as usual. "Dragonborn," Ulfric greeted in a tone that was more like a satisfied sigh. He sat up attentively on his throne, his piercing eyes regarding me with interest.

Ignoring his greeting, I shoved Ulfric's war-axe back into his hands. He sighed. "Balgruuf made the wrong decision."

"Indeed," I replied.

I finally trusted myself to make eye contact with him. My heart rebelled against my head and started beating so hard I was afraid it would leap right out of my chest. "It's good to see you Dragonborn." His voice was smooth as if he had rehearsed this line many times. Perhaps he was truly happy to see me. I on the other hand, tried to tell myself that I wasn't happy to see him.

"I'm sure," I said sarcastically.

He blinked, surprised by my rebuttal. "Well, enough pleasantries I suppose," he coughed awkwardly. "I'd like you on the front. We march for Whiterun as soon as possible."

"Fine," I said firmly. _Why would he want me on the front? _

"I wish you to fight side by side with Galmar. The two of you can force Balgruuf to surrender."

"Are you sure you want to trust me with such a task?" I said bitterly.

His eyes widened. "What do you mean?"

"After all, I'm just a naïve youth who knows nothing of the world," I said menacingly.

I heard him sigh deeply, while he put his face in his hands. "Wait, Dragonborn, I – "

Galmar nosily entered the throne room at this point, and I turned to him interrupting Ulfric. "When do we leave for Whiterun?"

"Before first light tomorrow. Meet us at the stables just before the sun rises. I suggest you get some sleep Unblooded. You're going to need it." Galmar replied, shooting Ulfric an amused glance.

"Good. I'll be there." I started to walk away knowing that Calder would follow.

"Dragonborn," Ulfric said irritably. "You're not still mad at me are you?"

I ignored him, and gave Calder a smirk. Before I left, I heard Galmar saying: "Do you have your foot in your mouth _again_ Ulfric?"

"Fuck off Galmar," Ulfric snapped.

(~~)

The next morning, Calder and I got up way before the sun rose and we headed to the Windhelm stables. There was already a small group of Stormcloaks gathered together at the edge of Windhelm. Once Calder and I took our horses out of their stables, we met Galmar and a few others talking amongst themselves. "Ah, you crawled out of bed Dragonborn," Galmar said.

I snorted, trying to cover up a yawn. "The dawn hasn't even risen yet."

Galmar cracked a small smile. "Dragonborn, you've met Ralof, I assume? He was just made Captain."

I turned to the man he was pointing to. I couldn't believe my eyes. Ralof was the Stormcloak who helped me out of Helgen those couple of years ago. He looked quite a bit different. He kept his blonde hair shoulder length and his beard was clean shaven. Like most everyone of the pure Nord race, he was quite a bit taller than me. "Ralof?" I asked, surprised.

He squinted. "Have we really met before Dragonborn?"

I grinned, not able to contain my excitement. I had always wanted to run into him again. "Indeed."

He scratched his head. "I would remember meeting such a beautiful woman if I had."

I raised an eyebrow and gave him an ironic smirk. "Well, apparently I'm easily forgotten then. I believe you called me 'Prisoner' back then."

His eyes widened in recollection. "By Ysmir, you're the woman I helped out of Helgen!"

I smiled widely. "I certainly am."

Suddenly he grabbed me and pulled me into a tight hug. He was so strong that I found myself short of breath when he released me. "Talos, don't break me," I sputtered.

Ralof frowned, but it was obvious that he was struggling to keep a straight face. "I'm sorry."

I smirked once I caught some air into my lungs. "It's fine."

Galmar had signaled us to leave, so Calder and I mounted our horses. Ralof stayed at the front with me so we could talk. I put my Nightingale Hood up to combat the cold weather. Unfortunately it didn't help; I was still chilled to the bone. The other Nords around me were wearing furs, but the cold didn't seem to bother them at all. Was I the only one who hated the weather? "I must admit woman, I've thought about you a few times over the years," Ralof admitted to me.

I smiled and accepted a set of furs that my housecarl thoughtfully gave me. "Well that's a coincidence. You've crossed my mind as well."

He shook his head, laughing. "You are incorrigible as usual aren't you?"

"I suppose so." I hugged the furs tight around my body.

"So tell me, what have you been up to since we last met?"

I sighed. "Oh, just the usual. Dragon slaying, dispatching Miraak; you know, usual stuff."

He raised an eyebrow. "I can't believe that you're the Dragonborn."

"Would you like me to prove it?" I huffed.

He grinned. "No, I believe you. It's just – "

"That you thought the Dragonborn was a man, right?" I scowled.

He shrugged. "Most people do."

"Careful Ralof," I warned. "You do not want to tamper with me."

"Is that a threat?" He winked.

I exhaled sharply. "By the Nine, you have gotten very difficult haven't you?"

He chuckled. "You're one to talk. You're certainly not that soft-spoken girl I met in Helgen."

I shrugged. "I was never soft-spoken."

"Maybe. But I can remember how quiet you were. Now, that is not to say that your confidence as a warrior didn't shine through. You moved with the grace and elegance of a dancer. It was quite the sight to witness." I could feel him eying me, and I was glad of my face cover so he could not see my expression. "I am beyond pleased Dragonborn, to see you again."

"And I you, Ralof."

Along the way to Whiterun, Ralof and I talked quite a bit. Galmar kept stealing curious glances back at us and I had a feeling that he'd be reporting to Ulfric my every move.

"Unblooded?" Galmar's deep voice questioned me, interrupting a question Ralof was asking me.

"Yes Galmar?" I made no attempt to hide my annoyance.

"Is that Ysgramor's axe on your back?"

"Uh, yeah…This is Wuuthrad." I fingered the hilt of the blade protectively. It was a heavy battleaxe, but it was the only two-handed weapon I knew how to effectively handle.

"How in the name of Talos did you get that blade?" Galmar looked at me suspiciously.

"From the Companions. I helped them avenge Kodlak Whitemane. In return I was offered the position of Harbinger, but had to turn it down. Aela gave me Wuuthrad instead." I became part of their Inner Circle, but opted to be cured of lycanthropy. Aela the Huntress became the new Harbinger and I went on my way. The Companions were my friends since I was a child, but as with most places I never felt like I truly belonged there. After I came back from Solstheim, I found myself returning to Jorrvaskr. Something in my mind told me that it was what I needed to do; like it would be some sort of redemption for all the awful things I've done. Even as a Companion, I still did a lot of killing. I only killed those who opposed me, never the innocent, but even still the act was almost numbing to me now. The paralyzing pain that I used to feel from killing another person was barely there anymore.

Galmar raised an eyebrow. "You're just full of surprises, eh Dragonborn?"

I smiled. _If only you knew. _

It wasn't that long before we finally arrived at the Whiterun Stormcloak camp. Our horses were set far enough away from the city to graze. I would never subject Shadowmere to the war, even though I knew she could hold her own in any fight.

Galmar brought all of his men close together, so he could give us his prepared speech. While he talked, I looked up at my Housecarl. "Calder," I whispered. "There's something I'd like you to do for me."

"Anything milady," he whispered back.

"I can't be certain if Balgruuf evacuated the city. But what I can say is, please do not kill anyone unless you absolutely _have _to. I cannot justify it on my conscience. No one innocent needs to die if it can be avoided."

Calder nodded. "I agree. It will be done."

I put a hand on his shoulder. "Thank you."

His hand covered mine and he gave me a smile. "Of course."

Once Galmar finished his "pep-talk", he called over Ralof, Calder and myself. "This is what will happen," he said gruffly. "The walls of Whiterun will be guarded by a barricade. It will be our job to take it down to get into the city. We must force Balgruuf to surrender. Dragonborn," he focused on me now. "Ulfric wants you with me at all costs." He fixed me a hard glare. It seemed that he did not agree with Ulfric's decision. I couldn't blame him really. To him, I was only a woman; I didn't deserve special treatment because I was the Dovahkiin. "You and Calder will sneak your way up to open the drawbridge. Ulfric tells me you have some experience in sneaking eh?" He growled.

I smirked. "Indeed."

He grunted. "I warn you now Dragonborn, if you screw this up for us, you'll want to be on the next boat to Solstheim. Ulfric will not be pleased. That being said however, he wants you alive at all costs."

_Oh does he now? _I thought. "I won't 'screw this up'," I snapped.

"Good. Now, Ralof you will make sure that the Dragonborn is protected."

"Aye Sir."

I snorted. "I don't _need _protection. What do you think Ulfric hired me a Housecarl for?"

Ralof gave me a curious glance, but Galmar seemed to have a permanent glower plastered on his face. "You _will _follow orders woman. If you don't, I'll kill you myself and save Ulfric the trouble."

"Would you like to try your chances?" I hissed, closing my fist around the handle of Wuuthrad.

Ralof moved between us. "This is not the time! I will do as you ask Sir. I can even create a distraction for her to pull the lever."

Galmar nodded, lowering his weapon. "Fine. Just make sure she gets up there unharmed. And woman," he set his eye on me. "Just because Ulfric favours you, doesn't mean I will. You need to prove yourself to me as well. I will not be so won over by your fiery personality and pretty face."

I scowled. "I never expected you to."

"Come on men, we march momentarily." He shouted to the group of Stormcloaks.

I took a deep breath. Everything was riding on me and I didn't understand why. Ralof turned to me then. "Relax Dragonborn, everything will work out." He put a strong hand on my shoulder. He gazed at me with a strange tenderness in his eyes. "If I die today Dragonborn, there's something you need to know."

"What would that be?" I raised an eyebrow.

Quickly, before I even understood what was happening Ralof's hand was on the back of my head, pulling me into a kiss. The assault was rough and I was astonished by the passion his lips held. Before I even had time to resist, he pulled away. "That was even better than I expected," he declared softly.

I exhaled sharply trying to restrain myself from breaking his nose. "What is wrong with you?"

He winked. "Nothing Dragonborn. That was just something I should have done long ago." As he started to walk away, I noticed the bemused expression on Galmar's face. He shook his head and I had a sneaking suspicion that he was going to relay this entire scene to Ulfric. _Like a child would to a parent_, I thought sarcastically.

Galmar lined all the soldiers up in preparation to war. Once he gave the command, the Stormcloaks started to charge and again, I wondered why they used this awful strategy. As we approached the wall, Ralof and Calder stayed in front of me as a human shield. I was never adept in archery, so the only long range force I had was my magic. The soldiers broke down the wooden barricade that barred our way to the drawbridge.

We dashed out of the way from arrows, as we snuck our way up the watch tower to find the drawbridge lever. "Dragonborn, stay behind me!" Ralof shouted over the commotion. He drew his sword, whilst putting the bow he was using on his back securely.

I grabbed Dawnbreaker firmly out of its sheath. "No, you stay behind me. We're going to sneak up here unnoticed. Follow me and don't make a sound!"

In my left hand I summoned a fireball to devastate any Imperials who stood in my way. Carefully, avoiding all line of fire, I snuck up the ramp, with my two companions backing my up. Eventually, I saw where the lever was hiding. "There." I pointed.

"I'll make myself a distraction," Ralof said.

"No! You'll get yourself killed!" I hissed.

"Good thing I kissed you then, eh?" He grinned, leaving me astonished. I watched him take a few arrows out of the quiver on his back. The bow was perfectly placed between his hands and he picked his victim. "Watch this Dragonborn."

His shot hit its target, instantly killing an Imperial captain. He drew another arrow, and again the mark was hit. He brought down what appeared to be a General. "Come on, let's pull that lever." He said, sprinting up the ramp.

Calder and I quickly followed. I couldn't believe that he was so reckless. It didn't make any sense to me, this type of fighting style. Ralof sprinted towards the two Imperial soldiers standing guard by the lever. His sword left his body in a flash; it entered the soldier's skin like a knife going through butter. It wasn't long before the man fell. Idly, I noticed Ralof staring right into the man's eyes as he took his life. Perhaps he truly enjoyed being the cause of a man's soul leaving his body.

Calder sprinted towards the last Imperial, whilst I made my way to the drawbridge lever. It was a heavy lever to move, but after a lot of force, it finally changed its position. The Stormcloaks rushed through the drawbridge as the Imperial soldiers desperately tried to fight us off. Calder, Ralof and I forced our way into the city.

I almost gasped out loud at the state the city was in. Whiterun was up in smoke; some of the buildings were in rubble. This beautiful city was put to ruins because of this ridiculous war that I chose to be a part of. I wasn't sure how I would be able to justify my actions. I may not kill anyone, but I was a participant in this. But in reality, what was the difference? What would dozens more deaths on my conscience matter?

The three of us followed Galmar as we were instructed to do. He and most of the other Stormcloak's were busy slaughtering every opposing soldier that got in their way. I desperately looked at Calder, whose face was as grim as mine. "Take heart milady!" He shouted beside me.

Every second felt like an hour as we fought our way up to Dragonsreach. We had to try hard to evade the pools of blood and the mass of dead bodies. Galmar kept on giving me dirty looks, as I avoided all manner of combat. Arrows were flying everywhere and it seemed just to be chance that we managed to avoid them.

Galmar was leading the party with his large battle-axe. He barrelled through the guard, seemingly not caring who he hurt. Once we made it up to Dragonsreach, we stormed the castle doors, to an awaiting party of Whiterun guards who were protecting Jarl Balgruuf and his housecarl Irileth. Ralof and Galmar took down the guard immediately without any pause.

Balgruuf gave me the filthiest glare after it was just Irileth and himself left alive. Dead bodies were scattered everywhere. "_You _Dragonborn, a _Stormcloak_?" He hissed.

I looked down to the ground. "My reasons for joining are none of your concern." I snapped.

"I see you seem to have a troupe of bodyguards," he said sarcastically, referring to the fact that both Ralof and Calder were standing protectively beside me.

I frowned, moving in front of them. "Bodyguards maybe, but neither my housecarl nor myself have even laid a sword on any of your guards." I looked him straight in the eye.

"I trusted you," he scolded. "I _helped _you. Look at all that Whiterun has done for you."

I glared at him. "And look at all _I _have done for Skyrim. Do you think I wanted any of this bloodshed?"

"Unblooded!" Galmar roared. "Shut it! Let's end this now!"

"We will never surrender to you scum!" Irileth shouted, drawing her weapon.

Everything happened so fast; Galmar rushed over to Irileth, giving her a brutal taste of his axe. She was amazingly blocking every blow that Galmar threw at her. Balgruuf on the other hand, decided to come at me. In my mind, I knew I could kill him with ease, but that wasn't a risk I could take. Even though he hated me, the biggest kindness I could do to him was to keep him alive.

"Zun, Haal VIIK!" I shouted, flinging the sword right out of his hand. The tremors from my Thu'um brought Balgruuf down to his knees. The words of power echoed through the halls of Dragonsreach. The Jarl's eyes widened, as he tried to steady himself from the fall. Galmar and Irileth stopped fighting to gawk at me.

"Balgruuf," I whispered. Dragonsreach was so quiet; my voice could be heard by everyone. "I don't want this to go any farther. Please surrender."

His eyes met mine in that moment and I saw something I had never expected to see from an ally. Fear; he was genuinely afraid of me. "If I surrender, don't hurt my people," he stuttered.

I paled. How could he seriously think that I would hurt anyone innocent? I backed away slowly. My head was spinning and I was certain I would faint. Calder steadied me. "It's alright milady," he soothed. What was wrong with me?

Balgruuf left to go gather his things, while Vignar Gray-Mane became the new Jarl of Whiterun. He congratulated me on my efforts, and decided to proclaim me the Thane of Whiterun. I wasn't paying much attention, but I believe that I thanked him for his "generosity".

"I need to get out of here," I whispered to Calder. He put his hands on my shoulders and tried to lead me out.

"Dragonborn!" Galmar's voice barked from somewhere behind me. I closed my eyes and turned around.

"Yes Galmar?" I said warily.

He glowered down at me. I don't think I had ever seen him angrier than I had now. "What in the name of Talos have you done today?"

"What exactly do you mean?" I asked innocently.

He stomped his foot on the ground. I was almost certain he would try to hit me. "You refused to fight. Why the fuck did you participate in this war if you will not kill anyone?!"

I stared at him vacantly. "I do not kill anyone who is innocent and does not deserve it. I only kill when I have to."

"No. You do what Ulfric and I tell you do! If I tell you to kill, then you _will _kill!"

I gritted my teeth together. "I _do not _want to slay anyone that is innocent. That is nothing short of murder!"

"You _should _have fought and killed the men that opposed us!" He yelled.

"The men that opposed us?! The Whiterun guards were defending their city. _My _city!" I screamed back at him. "I refuse to eradicate anyone that doesn't deserve it!"

Galmar started bellowing about how he was going to speak to Ulfric about my defiance. I just stared at him, slowly becoming consumed by my anger. That was when I felt it. There was something, a voice or a sensation inside me telling me to use my Thu'um. My skin felt like it was bubbling from the maliciousness of my thoughts. My mind told me to kill Galmar. _Paint Dragonsreach with his blood._ I inhaled, ready to shout him to pieces like Ulfric did to the former High King of Skyrim.

My eyes went wide. What was happening to me? "Ulfric will hear about this Dragonborn, you mark my words! You will be out of this rebellion! Now get back to Windhelm, _all _of you!" He yelled at the group of Stormcloaks enjoying my misdemeanour.

"Milady, what is it?" Calder looked at me with concern.

I looked down to the ground. "Something is wrong with me," I whispered. "I need to get home."

**_A/N: _**_So I finally introduce Ralof. Love triangle perhaps? I know technically he was supposed to be in the whole Korvanjund quest, but I completely forgot to add him in. So here we are. It's my story anyways, and I will not be closely following the quest line. I hope that this was an enjoyable chapter. We start to see sides of my Dragonborn's evil nature (it just gets worse from here ;))_


	5. Chapter 5

V

The return journey to Windhelm was taxing on both me and my companions. It was, in my opinion a long and completely senseless battle. Ulfric may have gotten Whiterun, but at what cost? Did he _really _care about Skyrim's people as much as he said he did, or was this only for his personal gain?

Before the other soldiers parted ways to one of the Stormcloak camps, I had noticed Ralof eying me. He smiled when he caught my gaze. I smiled back tentatively, hoping that the reason he kissed me wasn't because he had feelings for me. I tried to tell myself that it was only because we were in a life-or-death situation, but as I stared at him from the corner of my eye, I found myself wondering what he was thinking. He grinned at me then. _Um, _I thought, _maybe I don't want to know after all. _

(~~)

As we headed back, Galmar made a habit of throwing me dirty looks. The encounter between us in Dragonsreach was nothing short of intense. I felt the tension between us throughout the entire journey home, even though his horse was quite far from mine.

I wanted to kill him. Where did that thought even come from? I was afraid; that was something I never allowed myself to feel. The fear of this power inside of me was paralyzing. What if I had given into my primal instincts and killed him?

The one question that was on my mind wasn't about hurting someone innocent, but something that haunted me in my dreams.

Was I going to turn into Miraak?

(~~)

I didn't speak to anyone, and no one spoke to me until we entered the city. "Dragonborn," Galmar's deep voice surprised me, making me jump slightly on the saddle. He had ridden his horse up beside mine. I merely nodded, acknowledging his summons. Neither one of us would look each other in the eye. "Do not come to the palace until you are beckoned to do so."

I dismounted Shadowmere and put her into a stable I knew she'd be safe in. When Calder and I returned to Hjerim, we found something surprising. "Are we in the wrong house?" I asked Calder.

He raised an eyebrow, looking around skeptically. "No milady. This is Hjerim."

"Then, why…Who?" I stuttered.

The house was completely furnished. Every room was full of paraphernalia that made the place look more like a home that I actually wanted to be in. "The only one with a key besides us is Jorleif," my housecarl pointed out.

"We'll ask him when we get 'the summons'," I said sarcastically. "I'll take a bath while we wait."

(~~)

It wasn't long until I received word to go see Ulfric. I told my housecarl to stay home and relax. It was nearing dark now when I stepped outside to walk to the palace. Once I got inside I was greeted by an empty throne and Jorleif sitting at the dining table. "Dragonborn," he said through a mouthful of ale.

"Where is Ulfric?" I asked.

"He's in his chambers. He'll be expecting you there."

I nodded. "By the way, do you know who furnished my house?"

He smiled. "You didn't hear this from me, but you should probably ask Lord Ulfric about it."

"Thanks Jorleif," I said. I ignored the smug look that Galmar and Yrsarald gave me as I entered the war-room. Every step up that long flight of stairs was torture. I took a deep breath before I knocked on the door of Ulfric's room.

"Come in," his deep voice said, making my blood sing. It sent a shiver down my spine.

I pushed open the metal door and walked in. "Dragonborn," he whispered my name. "Close the door." I did as I was told. Ulfric came up to me and offered me his hand. I stared at it reluctantly. "I'm not baiting you woman." He flashed me a kind smile.

I nodded, but still felt uneasy. When his hand closed around mine, I felt a surge of energy pass between us that almost made me recoil in surprise. Instead, he was the one who let go after all; perhaps he felt it too. He motioned for me to sit across from him and then he stared at my face for what seemed like a long time. "Why are we here Dragonborn?" He finally asked.

I looked down to my lap. "I suspect because of what happened in Whiterun."

He nodded, but said nothing else. I frowned. "Look, I was only doing what I thought was right. I didn't mean- "

"Enough," he said softly, holding his hand up.

I shut up immediately. He stood and poured some water into a goblet for me. "Galmar told me you forced Balgruuf into surrender."

"Yes Sir," I mumbled.

"He also said that you 'threw the weapon out of his hands'." He smiled, making air quotations with his fingers. "The Disarm shout if I am correct. He wouldn't say the words, but you and I both know which words of power make up that shout."

"Indeed." I agreed.

"Why will you not look at me?" He asked. "You were defiant as ever on the battlefield. Why should that change now?" He stood beside me and his fingers lightly brushed against my cheek, causing the heat to rise to my skin against my will. "Now why won't you meet my eyes?"

"Because I'm afraid of what I'll find in them," I whispered. I'm not certain why, but something about him brought out the truth in me. He lightly gripped my chin with his thumb and index fingers, forcing me to look at him.

Ulfric's eyes were kind and he was surprisingly smiling at me. I realized then, after a while of silence that he was waiting for me to speak. I shifted in my chair. "Um, Sir, I- "

"Ulfric," he interrupted.

"Ulfric," I sighed. "If you want me out of this rebellion, I completely understand. I'm defiant and- "

He laughed ironically like my very statement was appalling to him. "Dragonborn, I don't want you to leave Windhelm."

I was confused. "But, Galmar said- "

"Galmar said a lot of things, did he not?" He smirked and then shook his head. "No I need you."

My eyes widened. "Ulfric…"

He sighed, sitting back down again. "The Dragonborn is on the side of the Stormcloaks. I'm not going to let you leave so easily. The greatest power in all of Tamriel is on _my _side. I do not intend to take that for granted."

I flushed, fixing him with a scowl. "Is that all I am to you, a 'great power'?" _What? Why did I say that? _Do I really care that much?

"No," he smiled. "You're much more than that."

My stomach convulsed. Why did I get so much pleasure from hearing that? My heart sped up just by the way he was looking at me. I didn't trust these unfamiliar feelings I was having. It was strangely unsettling for a woman of my background to have butterflies in my stomach because of an older, conceited man. "There's something I'd like you to do for me Dragonborn," he said suddenly breaking me out of my daze.

I nodded. "Alright."

"That shout you used on Balgruuf; I want you to use it on me."

I stood up quickly, surprised by his request. "You _can't _be serious!"

"Oh I am, Dragonborn."

"No! I refuse!" I snapped at him.

He fixed me with a glare and then I watched as he walked to his chamber door. He called for a guard outside. "Whatever alarming sounds you hear from this room, do not come in." The guard looked confused, but he nodded in confirmation and then Ulfric closed the door again. "You _will _disarm me," he ordered.

"No!" I yelled, trying to make my way to the door to escape. "I will not!" I tried pulling the door open, but he grabbed my arm. "Let go of me!" I yelled, cocking my foot back to kick him squarely in the shin.

He let go of my arm just in time to avoid my blow. "Don't forget who you are dealing with Dragonborn!" He retorted. "I want to see exactly how much power you have!"

I leaned against the door, trying to avoid his sharp gaze. "Please don't make me do this," I said, my eyes welling up with tears.

His expression softened a little. "Why do you weep?"

I tried to compose myself by taking in a deep breath. "Because I'm afraid that I'll kill you," I whispered.

He placed his hands on my shoulders. "I trained with the Greybeards for ten years. I can withstand your power. You won't hurt me."

"What if you're wrong?" Just the thought of Ulfric becoming harmed - or worse - because of me was enough to paralyze me with fear.

I saw the hesitation in his eyes, but it only lasted for a second. "I'm not," he declared. _That Kingly arrogance he sported could be his downfall if he wasn't careful. _

Ulfric drew his war axe. "Disarm me."

"Ulfric, please." I pleaded. _I can't believe he wants me to do this! He's going to get himself killed! _

"Do it!" He took a few steps towards me.

"I can't!" I screamed. I backed away slowly, trying to break the closeness between us.

"Dragonborn!" He yelled. "Use the shout!" His tone of voice was so threatening; I couldn't be certain what he'd do next.

Without any warning, Ulfric came at me with his weapon. "What in Oblivion are you doing?!" I yelled, as I dodged out of the way of his axe in record time. My body hit the floor with a thump. It was inevitable that I would have bruises the next morning.

"Drawing you into battle." He wore a cruel smile. As I scrambled to get up off the floor, I realized that he was trying to anger me on purpose.

"You're insane!" I retorted, avoiding his blade again. "Aren't you a little too old to be doing this?" I snapped, retreating to the other side of the room.

He laughed. "Use the shout and this will all be over."

"Never!" I screamed. I started hiding behind furniture in order to avoid him. Even this was a difficult task because of his obvious prowess as a soldier.

"The Dragonborn is afraid! What a great song that will make!" He closed the distance between us and quickly came at me again. This time, I barely rolled out of the way.

_The bastard is intending to strike me! _"I'm not afraid!" I pushed a chair in front of him to hinder his movements.

He grinned maliciously, kicking the chair out of his way. "I think you are. And here I thought you were fearless!"

This time when he tried to strike, I felt a surge of anger flowing through me. _Shout_, my mind told me. Before I knew what was happening, I heard myself say, "Zun, Haal, VIIK!"

The weapon flew right out of Ulfric's hand, landing on the other side of the room with a loud clatter. He stood his ground as my Thu'um shook the room and tried to force him to his knees. My eyes widened with fear and I sunk to the floor; I couldn't look at him. _Gods, what if I hurt him? _I tried to choke back a sob, but all that escaped my lips was a strangled cry. "Dragonborn," Ulfric whispered from somewhere near me. I looked up, noticing how he offered me his hands to pull me up. The expression on his face was one of pure awe.

"Are you hurt?" I cried, meeting his eyes.

He chuckled quietly, bringing his hands up to cup my cheeks. "No. I told you that I could withstand your Thu'um."

"But…The power I have," I sobbed quietly.

"That power," he said slowly, "will win us the war." He smiled.

I recoiled from his touch, backing up farther from him. "The war?" I hissed. "I refuse to use my Thu'um for less than righteous reasons."

"I know the Way of the Voice is not something to use lightly." He slowly advanced back in front of me. "I believe that myself."

"I will not use my Voice unless I have to," I said sternly, folding my arms across my chest.

"I don't expect that Dragonborn. But, it will keep you alive. Use it wisely." He rearranged his sitting area that I destroyed during our makeshift battle, and sat back down in his chair. "Sit," he ordered. When I sat down across from him, I noticed the way he stared at me; it was like he was trying to force me to say something, but I wasn't sure what he wanted to hear. "Is something troubling you?" He asked me suddenly.

"I can't believe that you would taunt me like that," I barked.

He smirked. Apparently he wasn't taking my anger seriously. "I had to force you to shout. I won't apologize for that; your power is magnificent."

I bit my lip. _Oh gods. Should I tell him what's bothering _me? Ulfric Stormcloak was almost a Greybeard. If I had to avoid the long trip up to High Hrothgar, I would do so. "Ulfric, can I trust you?" I needed to figure out what was wrong with my Thu'um. If there was anyone besides Arngeir that could give me sound advice, it was Ulfric.

He seemed surprised, but pleased. "Of course. What is on your mind?"

"Okay," I sighed. "When we were in Whiterun, after I disarmed Balgruuf, Galmar started yelling at me."

Ulfric frowned. "I can speak to him."

"No, that's not the problem." I looked down to my lap. "I deserved it. It's just…"

"Yes?" He pressed.

"When he yelled, I felt myself getting very angry internally. And I got this feeling inside my head and body…"

"Go on," he said curiously.

My voice shook. "The feeling was telling me to kill Galmar. I mean, it wasn't even a voice telling me to do this, but it was like something was manipulating my thoughts."

He listened in awe. "You mustn't forget Dragonborn, that you are essentially not mortal. It sounds like your dovah soul is trying to control you."

"Do you know why this is happening to me?" I whispered, desperate for an explanation.

He rubbed his beard in thought. "How many dragon souls have you absorbed?"

"Enough," I mumbled. _I lost count after a while_.

"Perhaps it's having a reverse effect then. You may be becoming too overly encumbered."

"What do I do? I'm terrified that I'm going to hurt an innocent."

"Dragonborn, you have a strong heart. I see it in you every passing day. When those thoughts come into your head, try looking into your heart. Recall a memory that fills you with joy. The goal is to keep you grounded. Focus on that thought as hard as you can. In this, you can ensure that you always have a connection with your humanity." He gave me a reassuring smile.

I sighed. "Thank you. I will try that."

"You're welcome Dragonborn. Be strong," he said, gripping my hands to squeeze them.

I flushed. Every time his flesh touched mine, it was like my body had a will of its own. I couldn't keep letting my emotions rule me like this; I never have before. So why was Ulfric Stormcloak affecting me so much? "I also heard some information," he said casually, sipping on his tankard of ale.

"Yes?" I pressed, eager to focus my thoughts onto something more rational.

"Galmar told me that you were kissing Ralof."

I scoffed. "Excuse me?" _How did I know that that old Nord would tell Ulfric everything that I did?_

"Are you bedding him?" He asked in an accusing tone.

"Um, _no_!" I glared at him. Why did he care? "Even if I was, how is that your business?"

"So this was without your permission?" He furrowed his eyebrows angrily.

"That's so not the point- "

"Bastard," he interrupted, slamming his tankard on the table. Liquid spilled everywhere. "He's not going to get away with this. I'll- "

"No," I countered. "You will not do anything! Ralof helped me escape Helgen. I owe him my life. We are friends, nothing more."

He snorted. "I fail to see that reality I'm afraid, Dragonborn."

I shrugged. "I never asked for your opinion."

He laughed, but he still seemed unsettled for some reason. "I know."

I sat there uncomfortably as he continued to stare at me, until I thought of something I wanted to ask him. "Um," I started.

He raised an eyebrow. "Um? My, that is a phrase that will succeed in stopping a king in his tracks."

I frowned and drank slowly on the water he had poured earlier for me. "No need for your sarcasm."

He smirked, seemingly amused again. "Continue then."

"Did you furnish my house again?" I blurted out.

He blinked. "No."

"What do you mean, 'no'?" I crossed my arms over my chest and fixed him with a skeptical eyebrow raise. _What a liar. _

"I mean that I was not the one who furnished your house."

I sniffed. "Really? Your steward has the only other key, so _who _else could it be?"

He shifted uncomfortably in his chair. "Well…Technically Jorleif furnished it, but I did pay for everything."

"Why? Ulfric, that money is clearly better spent on the war," I mumbled.

"I have the money to spend, Dragonborn. The money is not an issue."

I flushed. "You don't need to do this."

"It's already done."

"Well why? _Why_ did you decide to furnish my house?" I huffed.

He averted his gaze away from mine. He rubbed his face in his hands and mumbled something inaudible. "Ulfric?" I questioned.

"It's an apology," he said quickly.

I raised my eyebrows. "What is?"

"The furniture."

"How is _that _an apology?!" I hissed.

He gave me one of the most serious stares I had ever seen. "It is the only apology you will get, so take it or leave it."

_Arrogant bastard. _I scowled. "You could have just said sorry."

He smirked. "This is the only way I know. I would do a lot less for anyone else."

"So I'm supposed to thank you now?"

"That would be the regular procedure, yes."

I scoffed. "Fine. Thank you, but allow me to pay for it."

"I will _not _allow that." He said sternly.

"Why not?!" I stood up, placing my hands on the table.

"Because Dovahkiin, the furniture was a gift."

I bit my lip. "I don't deserve gifts. I have enough."

He sighed, exasperated. "Look…I upset you. Before, I never bothered, nor did I care to make amends. You," he hesitated. He met my eyes again. "What are you doing to me woman?" He whispered.

I turned scarlet. "W-what do you mean?"

He smiled, but it didn't meet his eyes. "It matters not."

"But- " I protested. _What did he mean by that? _Could I possibly be having an effect on him as well?

"I believe I'll have an assignment for you soon," he interrupted. "Please stay around Windhelm until you receive your orders."

"Ulfric- "

"You are dismissed, Dragonborn," he said firmly.

I paled. "Okay," I mumbled, leaving his room quickly. As I descended down the stairs, I noticed how dizzy I felt. My head was swimming from the magnitude of the conversation I had with Ulfric. I walked out of the Palace of the Kings more confused than ever.


	6. Chapter 6

**_A/N: _**_This is one of my longer chapters; a lot happens. My MC starts to reveal some dark things from her past. I just want to issue a warning. From here on, darker events happen, and that is why there is a "Mature" rating. I hope you enjoy the story!_

VI

Calder and I spent most of the next few days trying to find ways to occupy ourselves in Hjerim. There wasn't much else to do but sit around and wait for Ulfric to give me orders. I still wasn't too sure what had happened back in his bedroom; what had brought him to such hostility before I left? I thought I used to understand men and what drove their actions, but no experience I had ever had could have prepared me for the likes of the stubborn Jarl. Ulfric Stormcloak was an enigma; it was as plain as that.

"Here's the last of the crates milady," Calder walked into my upstairs bedroom with a wooden crate full of books I had collected over my adventuring days. My housecarl and I had gone shopping around for some bookshelves to place all my books in. I wanted Hjerim to feel more like a home for the two of us considering I knew how long we'd be in Windhelm for. He placed the crate on the floor beside me.

I was sitting cross-legged on the plank flooring, sorting through the rest of my books. "Thank you Calder," I smiled at him. "Feel free to use this library as much as you want." I had hired a carriage to deliver me all my books that I had stashed in Windstad Manor over in Morthal throughout the years. The house was sitting mostly empty, save for two friends of mine from the Thieves Guild I had hired to look after the place.

"Thank you. I will do just that." Calder pried open the box with a dagger and we started to sift through the contents. "What are these?" He picked up something that looked like files. He handed me one of a set of three folders.

I smiled slyly at the recollection. "Yes, I found these in the Thalmor Embassy." I started looking at the file of Delphine, almost smirking at the contents. The bitch wanted me to kill Paarthurnax, the Grandmaster of the Greybeards and one of my good friends. Yes, he may have been Alduin's lieutenant in the Dragon War, but he had clearly reformed his ways, and sought to aid mankind instead of destroying it. He and the Greybeards helped me more than anyone else had. Paarthurnax did not fear me as most others did. Instead he gave me hope, and without him or the Greybeards, I would have never realized my true potential. The Blades could rot in Oblivion for all I cared. Their betrayal was something I would never forgive.

"Milady," Calder said suddenly.

"What is it?" I asked, worried at the expression on his face.

He looked grave. "Have you read the file on Ulfric?"

My eyes widened. I had completely forgotten that I had found a file on him. Unfortunately, I was too occupied with the Alduin crisis to ever read it. It lied forgotten inside my house for well over a year. "What does it say?"

He shook his head. "You _need _to read this."

I grabbed the file from his outstretched hand and slowly read the contents. "Oh gods," I whispered. "This…" I hissed. How could I have not seen this before? Ulfric was in serious trouble. "He has to see this!"

Calder nodded in agreement, his eyes betraying his feelings. "Let's go," I sighed. I wasn't sure if I was even welcome in the Palace of the Kings, but this file proved to be a legitimate reason to intrude…right? I exhaled sharply, pulling myself off the floor to prepare to leave my house. Calder followed, and soon we were outside in the cold again. I shivered under my armour. I preferred my Nightingale armour over the Stormcloak armour I was told to wear. Unfortunately, despite my stubbornness, I needed furs to wear in this divine forsaken city.

The weather seemed to make our trip that much longer and I was relieved when we finally came upon the palace. Calder helped me push the heavy doors open. Ulfric's throne was surprisingly absent, so the first place I thought to check was the war-room. Sure enough, Ulfric, Galmar and Yrsarald were crowded around the strategic map of Skyrim.

"Ice-Veins!" Yrsarald addressed me enthusiastically, causing the other two men to look at me.

"Ice-Veins? What in Oblivion are you calling me that for?" I questioned, eying him strangely.

Galmar, based on his expression, wasn't pleased to see me and Ulfric was seemingly refusing to meet my eyes. "The men have taken to calling you that. The thick blood of our land has seeped into your heart." The Jarl's voice sent shivers down my spine. Even while he spoke, he stared straight down at the map instead of meeting my eyes the way he usually did. This was strange; I always had his attention in the past. Perhaps, I wasn't needed by him anymore. The thought was enough to make me physically sick.

I sighed. "Alright. That's an…interesting name."

"It's fortunate you're here Dragonborn," Ulfric started. His tone was almost curt. What had I done to upset him?

Despite my misgivings, my heart leapt at what he said. "It is?" I ventured carefully.

"Indeed. I need you at the Falkreath Stormcloak Camp. Here is a map to find your way," he handed me a folded piece of parchment. "Depart at once." He and the other men turned back to the map of Skyrim on the table.

I flushed. He was sending me away… "Ulfric?" I asked shyly. I felt like a child around him. _Get a grip woman; you're the Dragonborn for divine's sake!_

He didn't turn towards me. "What do you want Dragonborn?" He asked irritably.

"I need to speak with you." My voice was steady despite how my inner turmoil was threatening to tear me open. "Please; it's important," I added desperately.

He exhaled sharply. "Anything you need to say to me, you can say in front of my men," he said sternly.

"Ulfric, I really think- "

"My patience with you is at its limit woman," he hissed.

My eyes widened, surprised by this. "Fine. Then you all need to see this. I have some information that you may find alarming." The three men looked at me now, waiting impatiently. "You may have heard rumours about my escapades around Skyrim," I started. How could I just show him this file without a backstory?

"Is it true that you've been to Sovngarde?" Yrsarald asked in awe.

"Yes," I confirmed. "Anyways-"

"Did you meet anyone important?" He asked.

I sighed. "I met Ysgramor. He was very nice."

"You're trying to tell me that you actually _met _Ysgramor?" Galmar questioned skeptically.

"Yes. Can I continue?" I snapped.

"Enough questions, both of you. Let her continue." Ulfric ordered.

I exhaled sharply. "Anyways, I found myself receiving an invitation to Elenwen's little party at the Thalmor Embassy. I was trying to find out if they were in any way responsible for the dragon uprising in Skyrim. Once there, I snuck my way into Elenwen's Solar to steal her files."

"I had heard something about someone infiltrating the Embassy. I should have known it was you," Ulfric said. The pride in his voice made my insides convulse. I didn't need his approval, but I found myself craving his praise when he gave it.

"Indeed," I replied. "Well, I found out that the Thalmor knew nothing about the dragons, but I did find something even more alarming. They had a file on you."

A tensed silence followed. "What does it say?" Ulfric hissed.

Calder handed me the file and I passed it over to Ulfric. He put his hand up to stop me. "Read it aloud," he demanded.

"I really think you should-"  
"Read it woman. Do not defy me."

I sighed, looking at Calder for encouragement. He nodded in confirmation. I opened the file, starting from the beginning:

"_Ulfric Stormcloak Thalmor Dossier _

_Status: Asset (uncooperative), Dormant, Emissary Level Approval_

_Description: Jarl of Windhelm, leader of Stormcloak rebellion, Imperial Legion veteran_

_Background:_

_Ulfric first came to our attention during the First War Against the Empire, when he was taken as a prisoner of war during the campaign for the White-Gold Tower. Under interrogation, we learned of his potential value (son of the Jarl of Windhelm) and he was assigned as an asset to the interrogator, who is now First Emissary Elenwen. He was made to believe information obtained during his interrogation was crucial in the capture of the Imperial City (the city had in fact fallen before he had broken), and then allowed to escape. After the war, contact was established and he has proven his worth as an asset. The so-called Markarth Incident was particularly valuable from the point of view of our strategic goals in Skyrim, although it resulted in Ulfric becoming generally uncooperative to direct contact. _

_Operational Notes:_

_Direct contact remains a possibility (under extreme circumstances), but in general the asset should remain dormant. As long as the civil war proceeds in its current indecisive fashion, we should remain hands-off. The incident at Helgen is an example where an exception had to be made – obviously Ulfric's death would have dramatically increased the chance of an Imperial victory and thus harmed our overall position in Skyrim. (NOTE: The coincidental intervention of the dragon at Helgen is still under scrutiny. The obvious conclusion is that whoever is behind the dragons also has an interest in the continuation of the war, but we should not assume therefore that their goals align with our own.) A Stormcloak victory is also to be avoided, however, so even indirect aid to the Stormcloaks must be carefully managed._"

I looked up from the file to the shocked faces of the men who were avoiding each other's gazes. I placed the file down on the table. Ulfric was the first to break the silence. "The Thalmor have been using me."

"It seems that they desire a stalemate in regards to the war," I said gravely.

"Why have you not brought this to Ulfric's attention before?" Galmar growled.

I shot him a glare. "Oh, I'm sorry. I apologize if my first priority was defeating Alduin and the other terrors that plagued Skyrim. If it weren't for me, you'd have worse things to worry about than this blasted war," I retorted, balling up my fists.

"What will we do, Sir?" Yrsarald asked Ulfric, interrupting our rebuttal.

"We will continue the war as planned. Once I have my rightful title as High King, the mer will be dealt with," Ulfric replied steadily.

"How will you deal with the Thalmor? Your armies aren't big enough." I snapped.

"The Stormcloak armies are plentiful, woman." Galmar piped in, shooting me an amused smirk. He seemed to think that because I was young, I had no idea what I was talking about.

"Oh are they? Do you really think that only with the Nords of Skyrim, you can take on the entire Dominion?" I asked sarcastically.

Galmar flinched. "Once Ulfric is king, we'll earn the loyalty of Skyrim's people, one way or another."

"And how do you plan to do that? The only way you'll ever defeat the Thalmor is if you unite _all _the races of Skyrim. You need every able bodied man and woman if you want to save the province. It may not be in my lifetime, or yours, but the Dominion will invade Skyrim. It is only a matter of time," I said plainly.

"Unite all the races? What would you have Ulfric do? Let the lizards and the skooma dealers into the cities?!" His voice rose to a fevering pitch.

"That would be a start! Perhaps the Dunmer would be of use if they weren't inside the Grey Quarter!" I matched his tone.

"_You _would wish the mer to have special privileges over Nords, your own kin?!"

"I've met many decent elves! They are quite powerful and could be beneficial to your cause! _I _happen to have Bosmer blood inside my veins! If you would only accept them instead of ostracizing all of the mer!" I yelled right at him. He was seriously pissing me off.

Galmar's face turned red. It was one good way to tell that he was going to start swinging the punches. "I should cut out your tongue for saying that you elf-sympathizing bitch!" He gripped his battle-axe.

"You can try your luck you old, racist motherfuc-"

"ENOUGH!" Ulfric roared, stopping Galmar and I in our tracks. "YOU TWO ARE ARGUING LIKE PETULANT CHILDREN! It stops _now_!" He shouted._ Gods I have never seen him so angry_. He was truly frightening. "Galmar! You threaten her again, and I'll personally see to it that your head finds a permanent home on a pike!" He spat at his housecarl. Galmar hung his head, and Ulfric turned his sharp gaze onto me. _Oh gods, I'm next. _"And _you_," he hissed. "If I wanted your opinion I would have asked for it! _Never _assume that you have the freedom to order me around! You _will _stay out of this! Now, you have been told to go to the Falkreath camp! You will go there now, shut up and obey any orders that you are given! I will _not _tolerate disobedience anymore! Is that understood woman?!" He almost got right up in my face. I trembled under his glare, trying to hold back tears.

I swallowed back a sob. Crying in front of anyone was a sign of weakness for me. If I lost it now, I wouldn't be the Dragonborn anymore. I would just be another emotional woman. "Yes Sir," I mumbled quietly.

His expression seemed to soften slightly, but he turned back to his maps nonetheless. Calder put a steady hand on my back to lead my shaking figure out of the palace.

I turned back at the doorway, intending to have the last word. "Ignore me if you please, but mark my words Ulfric Stormcloak, you _will _lose Skyrim." Despite the tears falling down my face, I managed to keep my voice steady.

None of the men looked back at me, but I saw Ulfric's back tense up. I knew he would stay angry at me for quite some time. My body shook uncontrollably as we hurriedly left the palace. As there were no guards around, I succumbed to my tears. "It's alright milady," Calder soothed.

I took a deep breath to steady myself. "It's been a while since I've been yelled at like that."

"It happens to the best of us," Calder said reassuringly.

I sighed. "That's just it. I'm the Dragonborn. Most people fear me. I didn't think anyone had the stones to stand up to me like that. Perhaps I have grown arrogant with all this power." A truer statement was never spoken. I thought I was untouchable; that I was the closest thing to a god that Skyrim had. Ulfric and I had a lot in common after all. He assumed that his inauguration as High King would only benefit Skyrim. We both were extremely stubborn, hard-headed and set in our ways.

Calder only smiled. "Maybe milady. But even still, he had no right to treat you so. What did you do to anger him so much?"

I bit my lip. "I don't have a clue. He said a few days ago that he needed me. Now I'm not so sure. Why does this bother me?" I thought I had said the last part to myself, but it turned out I said it aloud.

He sighed. "Do you have affection for him?" He ventured.

I turned away from him. Was that it? Did I harbour feelings for Ulfric? No, that was preposterous! "That…Can't be it," I said defensively.

Calder smirked, like he didn't believe me. I proceeded to replay the whole incident inside my head. Suddenly, like a crazy person I started to laugh. I laughed so hard that my sides were hurting. My housecarl started to laugh with me. "What is so funny?"

I was now crying for a different reason. "Oh gods, did you hear the way Galmar spoke to me? He hates me." I wiped the amused tears from my eyes.

Calder grinned. "I fear that you will not win his trust back so easily."

I grinned back. "I don't care. He shouldn't have trifled with the Dragonborn."

He chuckled. "You have the most admirable personality milady."

I smiled appreciatively back at him. "Come. We should leave Windhelm as soon as possible."

(~~)

Calder and I packed quickly, departing the city as if we were being chased. I pushed Shadowmere to the limit on the road, knowing that the exhilaration from the ride would calm me. I prayed that some bandits would try their luck with challenging me. I needed to vent some of my frustration out. Unfortunately, the road to Falkreath was unusually clear.

We arrived at the Stormcloak Camp early the next morning. The camp was nestled on the side of a mountain, with only a small group of men inhabiting it. I smiled. This reminded me of my days as an adventurer when sleeping outside was a way of life.

"Hey Dragonborn!" A familiar voice called out to me.

I turned to the source. "Hey Ralof," I greeted back. Considering recent events, I was willing to forget that kiss that Ralof forced upon me during the Battle for Whiterun. I just didn't have the energy to fight with anyone else.

It was quite late at night when I decided to give up on trying to sleep. I had nothing else to do but sit by the fire. "Hey, I can take over the watch for you friend," I said to the apparent exhausted Stormcloak soldier sitting by the fire. He thanked me gratefully and went back into his tent.

I sat by the fire, rubbing my face in my hands. No matter how much I distracted myself, _his _name always came to mind. The tears welled up again as I thought about the way he treated me. _Stop, _I thought, _get over it. _

I heard footsteps approaching. "Ice-Veins. Couldn't sleep either eh?" Ralof said cheerfully.

"Don't call me that," I mumbled, wiping my tears away.

He chuckled. "May I join you?"

I nodded. "I guess."

I hoped he couldn't see my tear stained face in the firelight. "Have you been crying?" He asked, sitting beside me on the spacious log.

I glared at him. "Of course not. Why would you think such a thing?"

"Even the mightiest of us have shed tears. What is troubling you?"

I blurted out everything. I don't know why I did, but I told him everything that happened with Ulfric when I last entered the Palace of the Kings. Ralof listened attentively. "Are you bedding him?" He questioned, when I finished speaking.

"Ralof! Why would you insult me so?" I hissed.

He put up his hands in defense. "It's just an observation. He gave you a house- "

"I paid for that house!" I interrupted.

"And he even hired you a housecarl," he said without missing a beat.

"Your point?"

"A man who does things like this is one who is courting a woman."

I growled. "He is _not _courting me. He asked me to be his mistress once and I refused." The fact was out of my mouth before I could stop it.

"Why didn't you accept?"

I snorted. "What do you take me for? Some kind of two septim harlot?"

He clicked his tongue in amusement. "Calm down. I'm sure you could have held out for marriage. He could give you so much. Plus, you would have an out from this damn war."

"Marriage? Why would I want marriage? Do I look like a woman who would do well settling down?" I hissed.

He sighed, his eyes staring blankly into the fire. "There's nothing wrong with wanting that. Marriage and family is something I would be privileged to have. It would be preferable to this war," he whispered.

My eyes met his. I realized he was right. There was something comforting about his revelation. Throughout my adventures, I had met many selfish and power hungry individuals. I could sense that Ralof was not like me with my internal struggle for power. He was a man of honour. "Ralof, what will you do after the war?"

He chuckled. "I wouldn't mind going back to Riverwood for a while. Find myself a wife, and maybe open an inn."

I smiled. "I think you would make a great Companion. You would even be close to your sister."

"All I know is I want a family someday. I crave that normal happiness."

We sat in silence for what seemed like forever. That was when I said something astounding; something I had told very few people in my lifetime. "I can't have children," I whispered.

"What do you mean?" He asked, meeting my eyes in astonishment.

_Why am I telling him this?_ My hand seemed to have a mind of its own, and I was lifting up my cloth shirt to expose my stomach. His eyes widened when he saw the long, jagged scar strategically placed on my womb. It was so large that it was fully visible in the firelight. "Who…Who did this to you?" He asked, horrified.

I laughed bitterly. "The man who did it is long dead. It was a well-deserved death."

The long silence between us wasn't uncomfortable. I was grateful that he didn't press me on my confession. "You could always adopt?" He said after some time.

I smiled. "Perhaps. But I would want to be the kind of mother to my children that mine was to me. Alas, as the Dragonborn, it isn't entirely possible for me to do this. I'm never in one place for long. There's always someone who needs my help."

"I think you would make a great mother. You care so much more about others than you do about yourself."

"Ralof, your words comfort me. Thank you."

He grinned. "So after the war, what will you do?"

I shrugged. "_If _this war ends, the Thalmor will invade eventually. I would have to stay and fight."

He cocked his head, and observed me with a strange expression. "Why?"

"What do you mean?"

"You've done everything for Skyrim. You've always put the needs of others ahead of your own. It would not be selfish of you to put yourself first for once. Do what will make you happy."

I flushed. He was right. "Once Ulfric loses Skyrim to the Dominion, I want to be as far away as possible. I want to take up permanent residence in Solstheim."

"Morrowind? Really?" He smiled.

I giggled. "I have a house in Raven Rock. I've made friends there. The Dunmer treat me as one of their own. Plus," I paused. "Solstheim has a real beauty to it."

"If that is your dream Dragonborn, follow it," he encouraged me.

I thought about what he said. I could still make a living there, dispatching ash spawn for the Redoran Guard. "Maybe I will. It'll be a good place to retire."

He laughed. "Why don't you go to bed? Galmar should be here tomorrow. You'll need all the sleep you can get."

I smirked. "Indeed. Thank you for talking to me. Friends like you are rare."

"Anytime," he grinned. "But don't go all mushy on me. Wouldn't want me to treat you like a woman eh?"

I laughed. "I wouldn't dream of it."

**_A/N: _**_I hope you liked this chapter! I'm not sure when the next one will be done, but I will be (mostly) following the Stormcloak quest-line, so the next will be the Battle for Fort Neugrad. Like I stated at the beginning, things will start to get pretty dark. My MC doesn't have a "fluffy" past; it is one she is still struggling with. Technically it is "Ulfric" centric I suppose, but "romance" is only one element. I have big plans ;D_


	7. Chapter 7

**_A/N: _**_Sorry for my absence everyone. I've been dealing with some personal stuff, plus exams have kept me really busy. As promised, the story is getting darker, hence the mature rating. Without further delay, enjoy the update. _

VII

All was quiet in the Stormcloak camp that morning when my eyes fluttered open. Instinctively, I had covered my face with the furs in my sleep as a way to combat the cold. Now, all I wanted to do was sleep forever knowing I had an important job to do. I reluctantly got up and started to hastily put on my armour. Once I was ready, I brought my hands to warm up in front of the fire in the center of camp.

Ralof was already up, cooking a small animal on a spit. "Morning. Want to share this with me?" He grinned. "Save you from hunting yourself." He turned the stick slowly, ensuring that the flame cooked every part of the rabbit.

"What about the rest of the camp?" I asked, taking my position on the log next to him.

"We all just kind of fend for ourselves around here. But _you _get the good stuff." He winked.

I clicked my tongue, giving him a very noticeable eye roll. "I come from a family of hunters. I know how to survive."

"So, does that mean you don't want any?"

I sighed, giving into the smell. "I would."

He laughed. "That's what I thought, Ice-Veins." His shoulder playfully bumped into mine and I shoved him right back. It felt good to just let loose. We ate silently, enjoying the comfort from each other.

(~~)

Galmar had arrived at our camp late that morning, and had set up his large tent near the back of the camp. I figured he was compensating for something with the size of it. He didn't pay the least bit of attention to me, but went straight to Ralof to give him orders. When Ralof returned to the center fire, he was carrying a map. He sat beside me and my curiousity got the better of me. "What is that a map of?" I asked.

He flashed me a gleaming smile. "Would you like to know what task we have?" He taunted.

"I wouldn't mind. I can help."

His smile was almost sad. "A bunch of our men have been captured in Fort Neugrad. I need to find some way to rescue them without harming our friends."

I frowned. This, at least, was something I could actually help with instead of fighting. I stared at the map, trying to figure something out. "Wait," I said suddenly. My index finger landed on a sketching of a small opening that looked like it was under the lake. "Is that another entrance?"

Ralof narrowed his eyes. "It appears to be. Maybe we can use that to sneak in. I'll get some men out there."

"I can do it."

"What are you talking about woman?"

"Look," I stood up. "I have a lot of experience in sneaking. I can sneak in and free the prisoners. The cave seems to lead to the prison, based on the blueprint."

"Do you think you can do that without getting caught?"

I stared down at him, annoyed. "Do you think I've lived a righteous path my entire life? I've done countless questionable things in my lifetime. Stealth is child's-play for me."

Ralof sighed. "I don't want to put you in danger like that. Sketchy background or not."

I put a reluctant hand on his shoulder. "I can do this. Please, let me try. I'm an excellent swimmer."

He looked me directly in the eyes; even then the hesitation inside his was apparent. "That innocent look in your eyes is making it hard to disagree with you. No wonder men would fall to their knees before you." He whispered.

My eyes widened. "What do you mean?"

He smirked and shook his head. "Ice-Veins, I'll let you do this. But, if anything happens to the men inside the fort, I cannot guarantee your safety."

"Why am I always being threatened?" I mumbled.

"There are a lot of men who think that you're Ulfric's whore." He said bluntly.

"WHAT?!" I snapped.

"It's not just that. Even though you're the Dragonborn, you deserve the same treatment as every other recruit. You've been given special privileges that the rest of us would have had to work for. Just do your best to prove yourself. Show everyone that you _deserve _to be that high of a rank."

He was right. My internal lust for power clouded my judgement. "I won't let you down Captain," I smiled.

(~~)

By that night, a group of Stormcloaks, their captain, Calder and I were crouched in a safe area outside Fort Neugrad, preparing for my infiltration. Ralof pointed to a lake. "Dragonborn, you're going to have to silently make your way underwater to find that cave. I think, by an approximation, it will be around there." My eyes followed his finger which landed on the backside of the fort by the lake.

I nodded. "Understood. I'll find it." I pulled on my Nightingale hood to better conceal me with the darkness.

"You'll be careful milady?" Calder asked. The concern in his voice made me smile.

"Don't worry Calder. I'll be fine." I reassured him.

"Dragonborn, once we hear fighting we'll come to your aid." Ralof stated. "Gods be with you," he added with a worried smile.

I nodded. "I'll see you soon." I snuck away from the group and hid myself behind a small tree, poking my head out to observe the fort. There weren't many soldiers on watch, but I saw one roaming around the lake where I was trying to get to. I knew I could carefully sneak attack him with my sword, but I wasn't going to risk getting my friends killed.

I practically crawled my way towards the lake, using the darkness and the small mountain beside me as cover. Once I passed the soldier, I carefully made my way over to the fort and placed my back against the wall of the fort itself. I shimmied along the stone until my boots touched water. _This is it_, I thought, peering into the lake. It had seemed so long since I had done a real mission like this. My hands were itching for blood…

I clenched my fists. _Focus_. Quietly, I walked into the lake until I was deep enough to submerge myself. I searched around, looking for the darkest part of the water. Once I found it, I took a deep breath and ducked underneath. I forced my eyes open and I swam towards the small cave that was near the bottom. I struggled to make my way to the deepest part of the lake on one breath of air. I passed through the cave, and finally I saw light just as my lungs were screaming for air.

When I finally reached the surface, I gulped in as much air as I could and climbed out of the water. I crawled up onto the rock, trying to steady myself. There was a tunnel that hopefully led into the fort. I gripped the hilt of my sword and sighed, walking into the unknown.

(~~)

The tunnel ended and poured right into the prison of the fort. There was an Imperial officer sitting at a desk, apparently asleep on the job. I snuck around him, locking eyes with one of the Stormcloak soldiers in a cell. I put my finger over my mouth to silence the man. He nodded his understanding and I crept over to his cell, pulling a lock-pick out of my boot. From examining the lock, I concluded that it was poorly made and would open rather easily.

I focused on my task at hand, and within seconds the lock clicked open. The soldier quietly pushed the door open. "Get yourself armoured," I whispered. "I'll free the others."

He nodded and crept over to a trunk that probably contained all their weapons and armour. I got to work opening the locks and the captured men filed out to armour themselves. Behind me, I heard the slicing of a blade through skin as I opened the last lock.

"That's for imprisoning us," one man hissed.

The last soldier in the cell looked like he had definitely been tortured. His face was a gruesome sight. His left eye had been cut out; recently, from the blood all over his face and clothes. It reminded me of the deep scar I had gotten on my cheek from Imperial soldiers.

He stared at me emotionlessly, as I grabbed his hand to pull him up. "Come on, we have to take the fort," I said kindly.

The man managed a small smile, nodded and walked out of the cell to his comrades. "What are our orders?" One soldier asked me. "You're on our side, aren't you?"

I took my hood off so the soldiers could see my face. I flashed them what I hoped to be a gentle smile. "I am. Ralof sent me in to free you men. He said he and the rest of the soldiers would come to our aid as soon as they heard fighting."

The man nodded. "We knew Ralof would come to our aid."

"Are you men strong enough to fight?" I inquired.

They looked at each other. It was obvious that they hadn't eaten or had much in the way of hydration. "Yes ma'am," one of the soldiers stated.

"Are you sure you can fight?" I asked the man with the missing eye.

He merely stared at me, like he couldn't believe that I was so forward. I sighed and picked up the greatsword from the dead Imperial's body. I handed it to the large Nord, with a kind smile. "You look like a man who favours two-handed weapons." His large hands gripped the hilt of the sword. He met my eyes, and gave me a slow nod.

(~~)

The rescued Stormcloaks fought their way through the fort, led by me. I had memorized the map of the place, and brought them to the courtyard. I stayed inside, as I had decided to look for the Nord man with the missing eye. He had disappeared somewhere inside and I worried that something had happened to him.

After looking for a few minutes, I found him standing calmly over a writhing Imperial inside a bedroom. The Nord brought his eye to mine as I entered the room. I all but ignored the Imperial. "Is this the man who cut out your eye?" I asked softly.

"Yes," the Nord said after a while. His voice was deep and rough, just like his appearance. He was tall; taller than Ulfric, or even Calder, and he was strong. I barely noticed the gory gouge on his face. I was used to wounds.

I sat on a bed on the other side of the room. "What's your name?"

"Hjorn," he replied, "no family name."

"Well, Hjorn. Why are you staring at him like that? Having troubles seeking revenge?"

"What would you know of this?" He hissed.

"I had to seek revenge on the men who beat my mother to death and hurt me too. I do know something of this," I offered a kind smile.

The Imperial soldier on the ground was bleeding out from a shoulder wound. Hjorn must have stabbed him to bring him down. I didn't understand the turmoil he was going through. Regret never crossed my mind when I had to kill the men who ruined my life.

Hjorn exhaled sharply. "What is the right thing to do?"

"There are two things you can do. Let him go, or kill him. Which would you regret more?"

"I – I don't know." He bit his lip.

I got up off the bed to face him. "For me, revenge was the best choice. I'd kill them all over again if I had to. Once they were dead, I felt peace. I never regretted what I did. Perhaps you may. You seem like you have more of a conscience than I did back then."

"You're a good person," he commented.

I smiled wryly. "No, actually, I'm not. Either way, the other option – to let him go – is a tough choice. That, of course, is the right choice, but it doesn't mean it's the best one. You may come to regret it; it could keep you up at night. Now, you must ask yourself, which choice will you regret more?"

He was silent for quite some time. "I would never forgive myself if I let him go."

"Then you know what you must do."

He sighed. "It won't get me my eye back."

"No," I agreed. "It won't."

The Imperial stirred. "Let…me go," he said in a shaky voice, as he tried to stand.

"Shut up, scum," Hjorn smacked the man back down to the ground.

I leaned against the opposite wall to give Hjorn his room. How I missed this. The thrill of the hunt, the feel of warm blood spilling out onto my hands; the light leaving my victim's eyes gave me a sick sense of jubilation.

It was a few years since I had killed for pleasure, and now I was doing my best to fight my evil nature by not giving into temptation. But this…this was something I could indulge in. Hjorn killing for revenge; that was the most satisfying and energizing kind of kill. I wished someone would challenge me, and then I could gratify this insatiable lust for blood.

"Get up and grab a weapon," Hjorn snapped at the Imperial.

The Imperial looked bewildered. "What?"

"We're going to fight. This is your chance to kill me," Hjorn taunted.

I smiled. He hadn't lost his spirit after what happened to him. I stayed motionless against the lone wall with my arms crossed over my chest.

The Imperial smirked through the obvious pain in his shoulder. He grabbed his sword in the hand that wasn't injured. "Smart move injuring my sword arm. Too bad for you that I'm actually better with this one."

"Enough talk milk-drinker!"

"You'll be missing that other eye before I'm done with you," he said thrusting his sword at Hjorn.

Hjorn dodged the blade with ease, and put on a steady grip on the greatsword. The battle didn't last long. Despite his handicap, Hjorn's strength was completely overpowering for the smaller Imperial.

Within a minute, Hjorn's sword decapitated the man, sending his head flying onto the bed. His blood covered the Nord, and he stood there, trying to catch his breath. He closed his eyes and tilted his head up towards the ceiling. "That peace you described," he said after a while. I thought he had forgotten about my presence.

"Yes?" I straightened my back.

"I feel it." He looked me in the eye now, offering me a hesitant smile.

(~~)

Hjorn and I walked outside the fort together. I squinted at the sunrise. When did it become light out?

"Dragonborn!" Ralof said loudly, when he saw me coming outside.

Hjorn looked at me. "You're the Dragonborn?"

I barely had time to nod before Ralof pulled me into a tight hug. "Gods woman, I'm glad you're alright."

I felt a little awkward hugging him back, but I hesitantly wrapped my arms around his back. "Were you worried?" I teased. This was getting uncomfortable for me.

Finally, he let me go. "Of course I was worried. The men said you stayed inside the fort."

"I went to find Hjorn." I nodded over to the man beside me.

Ralof blinked at Hjorn, noticing him for the first time. "Why don't you go see the healer?" I suggested to the large Nord. He nodded, walking away from us.

"How went the battle?" I asked, eying the mass of Imperial dead bodies.

"The fort is ours, thanks to you." Ralof smiled.

I shrugged. "It wasn't my doing. I never killed anyone here."

"You saved my friends. This will never be forgotten."

"Where's Calder?" I asked suddenly, starting to worry.

Ralof looked surprised. "I…I don't know."

I paled. "Oh gods…" I started to run around the courtyard in a blind panic. I found a tent located near one end of a wall. _Please be in here…_

He was inside the healer's tent, kneeling down beside an injured woman. "Calder?" My voice cracked a little.

He turned and gave me a smile. "Milady."

"Thank the gods!" I threw my arms around the back of his neck. "Don't do that to me again."

He patted my arms. "I apologize. But, I had to stay with Valinna here."

I turned my eyes for the first time onto the pretty blonde, blue-eyed Nord soldier. Her big, innocent eyes were holding back tears. "What happened?" I knelt down in front of her. Her bottom lip was quivering. She was a stunning girl. She was probably my age, but her face was flawless; pale with a pink blush on her cheeks. She looked like a girl who could have any man she wanted. That pouty way she held her full lips could bring any man to do her bidding.

I glanced at Calder. He was mesmerized by her beauty and childlike innocence. I wished that my own face was scar-free. The newly formed scab on my forehead was fairly straight. Ulfric did an amazing job stitching me up. I couldn't get that creeping feeling away from me that I needed to see him. My cheeks flushed from the thought. _I would kill for Ulfric to look at me the way that Calder looked at Valinna. _I bit my lip. Did that thought seriously enter my mind?

The girl met my eyes. "My shoulder popped out, when I tried to swing a battle-axe. Not my choice weapon, I'm afraid." She whispered, clearly trying to make light of her situation.

"Where's the healer?" I asked, visually examining her shoulder.

Calder spoke up. "The healer is looking after the man with the missing eye."

"That's Hjorn. You know," I stared at her shoulder, "I could fix that for you," I stated.

"Who are you?" She asked, confused.

"She's the Dragonborn," Calder replied for me.

"You…" She opened her eyes in awe. "I've been waiting to meet you for so long. I'm honoured."

I smiled. "Believe me, I'm nothing special. Either way, I have some experience with this. I can pop your shoulder back in easily. It must be paining you."

She bit her lip. "Okay."

"Calder, can you help me?" I asked.

"Of course milady."

"Hold her in place please," I said, and he gripped her as securely as possible.

"Why does he call you milady?" Valinna asked, fighting back tears.

"He's my housecarl, and he's refused to call me anything else," I smiled at him. "Calder, would you give her some leather to bite on?"

He nodded, temporarily releasing his grip on her so he could rummage through his bag. He placed a rough piece of leather between the shaking girl's teeth. "It's so you don't bite off your tongue," he explained.

Her eyes widened. "This will be quick," I said to her. "Keep her still please." I gripped her hand. In one fluid movement, I pushed up on her arm and twisted her bone in place. She screamed so loud, I thought my ear would burst.

When she stopped screaming, she burst into tears from the shock. I told her to move her shoulder when she was ready, and she nodded meekly. "Calder, why don't you stay with her for a while?" I whispered.

Calder nodded, and I got up and left the tent.

Ralof was waiting for me outside. "Was that you who made that girl scream?"

"Tss. The girl couldn't wait for a healer. It was the only thing I could do." I huffed.

"Your friend Hjorn has an incredible eye-patch." He commented with a grin.

I laughed. "He's going to be okay."

"Listen, we're going to Falkreath to celebrate our victory before we move camps. Please join us."

"Of course Ralof. I'd love to." I agreed.

"Great! We'll go back to our camp to pack, okay?"

"Okay. Let's go," I smiled, keeping my pace up with him.


	8. Chapter 8

**_A/N: _**_This chapter deals with torture, and the harshness behind my Dragonborn's dark past. Hope you all enjoy the update!_

VIII

Ralof, Hjorn, Valinna, Calder, a few other Stormcloaks and I travelled the short distance to Falkreath. It wasn't often that I relished in coming to this city. It was so dreary; the inside joke of this city was to poke fun at Falkreath's large cemetery. After we checked into the appropriately named "Dead Man's Drink", the group of us ordered dinner. The tables were so crowded that Valinna and I sat at the bar with our stews. In typical Nord fashion, Valinna drank her mead quickly, while I slowly sipped on one glass of wine.

Wine wasn't plentiful around Skyrim, but I hated drinking anything else. Mead, in my opinion was a disgusting drink that I had never gotten used to. Even still, I preferred to remain sober all the time. I needed to be alert.

Valinna seemed shy around me. "I still want to thank you. My shoulder is much better now." She flushed a little.

I took a slow sip of wine. "It's my pleasure Val. I'm glad I could help."

She blushed darker, embarrassed. "I just can't believe I'm having dinner with the Dragonborn. It's an honour."

I raised an eyebrow. It had been a long time since I had heard praise instead of condemnation. "Believe me Valinna; I don't deserve to be in your honour. I'm not deserving of your, or anyone else's admiration." I smiled at her.

She smiled back tentatively. "You're a real Nord right?"

I laughed. "Mostly. Why?"

She shrugged. "Why are you drinking wine?"

I grinned. "I don't drink much."

"Bad experience?" She pondered. She sipped on her stew delicately. Absently, I looked around and noticed the entire tavern of men stealing glances at her.

"Yeah, I can't keep the evil thoughts out of my head when I'm drunk. If I'm of sound mind, I'm less likely to go on a killing spree."

She blinked, and I hid my smirk. _That should keep her admiration off of me. _Val's grimace of surprise turned into a grin. "You're really different than I imagined."

_Well this is a new one. _"So Val, why did you join the war?" I asked. "You seem young."

"Ah," she took a sip of her second mug of mead. How did she look so dainty doing that? "My parents served in the Great War. They think, along with the rest of the Stormcloaks that the Empire sold Skyrim out to the Thalmor. I joined the Stormcloaks because I wanted to face my fears."

"Fears of what?" I asked softly.

"I wanted to gain strength. I've always been seen as a naïve girl who needed a man to keep her. I," she hesitated, "I admire you. Your strength and independence sets you apart from every woman I've met."

I wasn't sure what to say. "Valinna, you don't need to prove yourself in a war."

She sighed. "I've got to not only prove my courage to my parents, but to myself as well."

I nodded. "That I understand."

We were silent for a while, finishing our dinner. I looked up at a table near us. "You know every man here is staring at you?" I smirked, pushing the empty bowl away from me.

She flushed prettily. "I hadn't noticed."

"Valinna, you're beautiful. You know men want you," I teased.

She sighed. "I used to fall in the arms of the _most_ handsome men who wooed me. Now, I'm just trying to focus on the war." She laughed. "I do miss the closeness of a man beside me. You know what I mean?"

I looked down into my wine glass. "Oh gods," she stuttered after an awkward silence. "You're a virgin aren't you? I'm sorry."

I laughed loudly, noticing how a few of the patrons stared at me. "In a manner of speaking, I am."

"Why? I mean, have you not met a man who you would want to do it with?" She seemed appalled.

I figured that I'd shut her up once and for all. "It's nothing like that. I've lost the incentive after I was raped as a child."

Her jaw dropped. "Oh Divines. I'm so sorry. I'm such an idiot."

"You couldn't have known. It's okay Val," I gave her a reassuring smile.

"How are you acting okay about this?"

I shrugged. "It's over with. I stayed angry for too long. I killed the men who did this – "

"Men?! There was more than one?"

"Yes," I snapped. "Either way, it doesn't matter anymore. They're dead," I said as a finality.

Valinna looked distraught, so I decided to change the subject. "Is there any man who strikes your fancy?"

She flushed. "Actually…"

"Who?" I smiled curiously.

She shifted uncomfortably on her stool. "I love…Um, our leader."

My lips pursed. I did _not _expect that. "What?" I whispered.

"I love Ulfric," she admitted.

I gripped my wine glass, hard. _Ulfric. She loves Ulfric. Get it together. _I faked a smile. "When did you meet him?" I asked, trying to keep the venom out of my voice.

"When I joined the Stormcloaks. Every new recruit gets to meet him. He has amazing courage. I admire him so much." She had a dreamy look in her eyes. It made me want to punch her, or throw up. I wasn't sure which would be worse at this moment.

"Courage?" I scoffed. "He's arrogant, naïve, self-centered and a complete prick once you get to know him."

Valinna gave me a gentle smile. "You like him, don't you?"

"What?" I retorted. "Of course I don't. I'm just telling you how it is. Don't you think you should find a man your own age? He's at _least_ 30 years your senior."

She frowned. "You and I are close in age. We both like Ulfric, so what's the difference?"

"I promise you, I don't like him." It was a lie. I knew now that it was. I've been so blind. I hated him for how he spoke to me, but I couldn't deny these feelings to myself anymore.

"Are you sure? People talk. They say that you're his…well, whore. I know that isn't true. But you're thrown together a lot. Are you okay with this?" She blathered on, which only made me all the angrier. I wanted to disintegrate her with my shout.

I forced a smile. I should have strangled her, but I did my best to fight those actions. I remembered Ulfric's advice. _Think of a happy memory. _"I don't mind," I said evenly. "Go for him."

She breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank you."

"I'm just going to get some air," I said slowly. I left my wine glass on the counter, and left the tavern quietly. I inhaled the cold air, trying to calm myself down.

I hated this. I hated the turmoil of emotions I was feeling just from a man. I liked him. I never thought I'd ever be interested in anyone, let alone someone as _old _and arrogant as he was. I found a place on the steps to sit down on. I buried my face into my hands, and my keen ears heard someone approaching me.

"Hey," Hjorn's deep voice greeted me.

"Hey," I smiled at the unconventional greeting. He sat down beside me. "I like the eye patch," I said grinning.

He fiddled with it. "Thanks, I'm trying to get used to having one eye."

I nodded. "I'm sure it'll be fine. But you've got to admit, that eye patch is pretty cool."

He chuckled. "I agree. So," he started. "I heard the tail end of your conversation with Valinna."

"Ah, yeah…" I muttered.

"Why don't you just tell Ulfric how you feel?"

"What are you talking about?" I hissed.

I could feel him staring at me. "Look, there's no way in Oblivion that Ulfric would choose her over you."

I smiled bitterly. "I doubt that. Valinna would be the perfect trophy wife. She'd be obedient, which is something I could never be. She's absolutely gorgeous. And besides, she can give him children, whereas I cannot." I looked down into my hands.

"There's more than just giving him an heir. Sure, Valinna is gorgeous, but so are you."

I flushed. "I'm covered in scars. No man could look at that."

He smiled. "Your scars are beautiful. They are part of who you are. Both you and Ulfric have harsh pasts and your scars reflect that. You are not the kind of person to judge others on appearance. You took one look at my gory, missing eye and treated me normally. You weren't disgusted, nor did you pity me. You've helped me more than anyone else in my life. I will never forget what you did for me. That, in itself makes you beautiful."

I was touched. "Hjorn, that's the nicest thing I've ever heard from someone."

He smiled. "I meant every word of it."

I sighed. "Valinna is gorgeous. She can have any man she wants. Why does she have to want him too?" The pain in my voice was apparent. I had feelings for Ulfric and there was no going back now.

"You know," Hjorn started, "I've known Valinna a long time. Since she was a child actually."

I smirked. "Oh really? You're older than her, yes?"

"Ten years. She was quite the beautiful child."

I cocked my head and raised an eyebrow. "You love her don't you?"

"Yes," he mumbled.

"Oh Hjorn, that's great." I smiled genuinely.

He sighed. "I've loved her for so long. But she hasn't looked at me. Nor will she ever, with this eye."

"Maybe you're underestimating her. I'll talk to her. Who knows? Maybe I can get her away from Ulfric." I smiled a little.

"Thank you. I'm not getting my hopes up." He gave me a half-smile. "I'm going inside for some more mead. Join me?"

"Nah. I'm probably going to go for a walk. Clear my head."

He put a hand on my shoulder. "Stay safe."

After he went back into the tavern, the door opened again, and I saw Ralof and Calder exit. "There you are!" Ralof exclaimed.

I clicked my tongue. "I'm going for a walk."

"At this time of night?" Ralof asked concerned.

"You're welcome to join me if you want," I placed my hand on my hip mockingly.

Ralof nodded. "Of course we will."

(~~)

I walked slowly, in front of the two men out of Falkreath. I wasn't able to be fully alone, but this would be the next best thing. I sighed, trying to clear my head. This would not be easy to get over. _I have to learn to fight these feelings. _

That's when I figured out that we were being followed. Both Calder and Ralof noticed too, and were on the alert. Calder put his hand on my shoulder to stop me.

Four men, all wearing heavy steel armour approached the group of us. "Well aren't you a welcome sight?" Their leader sneered.

"What do you want?" I asked calmly.

"We've been hired to teach you a lesson. But, I think," he looked me over in a way that made my insides turn with abhorrence, "I think we can have some fun with you when your bodyguards die."

I glanced at Calder. "This one is mine," I smiled maniacally. The three of us drew our weapons, along with our enemies. "Do you have any idea who you just challenged?" I taunted the leader.

Both Calder and Ralof took on the other three, while the leader and I started our dance of dominance. The man laughed. "All I know is that someone wants you dead. And I'll see that happen."

"You were a fool to challenge the Dragonborn," I hissed, making a move with my sword to strike him.

My attack missed. He was a dual-wielder and was quite good at it. I was a better fighter however, and dodged every attack he threw at me. He was slow in his choice of heavy armour, and could not keep up with my speed. He came at me with a power attack, and I did my best to jump out of the way. He managed to trip me instead.

My sword went flying. "Fuck!" I swore.

"I've got you now bitch," he taunted standing over me.

"That's what you think," I replied. I found a weak point in his armour near his thigh. Quickly, I drew a dagger out of my boot and stabbed him in the exposed spot.

"Fucking bitch!" He screamed. It gave me enough time to grab my lost sword off the ground. "Fus, Ro, Dah!" I shouted at the man. It was well timed, as my Thu'um shook the ground beneath us. It was so strong that the mercenary flung hard into a tree. I heard the sound of bones breaking and his body laid limply against the trunk. His eyes widened in shock as I smiled with satisfaction.

I looked around and found Calder and Ralof, unharmed behind me. "Will you guys restrain him so I can question him?" I asked.

Ralof nodded, and they held the man's arms down. I had a feeling his back or shoulders were broken, so a restraint didn't matter much anyways. "Well, here we are," I said softly, bending down to face him. "Who sent you?"

He grinned through his obvious pain. "I'll tell you if you blow me."

I laughed, and flashed him a maniacal smile. I drove my fingers deep into his thigh wound. He screamed as I move my fingers around inside his torn flesh.

When I pulled my bloody fingers out, he looked like he would faint. "You sadistic bitch!" He spat out.

I grinned, and moved to torture him again. I enjoyed the way he screamed. It fed my evil soul. I paused, realizing there was something holding me back. It was Ralof's hand, stopping me. "Take a walk Dragonborn," he looked me directly in the eye.

I stood up, slowly sinking back into reality. I enjoyed this too much, and I allowed myself to indulge my inner demons. I should have known that my righteous friend wouldn't understand my struggle. I had always taken on an oath to never kill an innocent. Those were the only kills I've ever regretted. I loved the hunt and I got lost inside it. This was one of those times; I need to control it.

I turned my back on the three men and walked away. I stood, staring up at the sky. It wasn't long before I felt Ralof's arms around me, pulling me into a hug.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

Despite my better judgement, I hugged him back. "I'll be fine," I replied.

"Look," he ran a nervous hand through his hair. "What happened back there was not what I expected from you. You're a better person than that."

"You have absolutely no idea what kind of person I am," I said evenly. "I got lost in my temptation."

"Dragonborn, let me help you. If you let me and your friends in, we can work through this."

"Thank you Ralof," I said. I wanted to reassure him, but I knew in my heart that no one could ever help me. I had to deal with my demons on my own.

"Milady," Calder called me over. "I can't get any information out of him," he said apologetically when Ralof and I walked over to where he was.

"You should kill me yourself, you Nordic whore," the man sputtered.

Calder punched him, leaving his nose a bloody mess. "Can I kill him, milady?" He growled.

"I'll see what I can get from him," Ralof promised.

(~~)

Ralof asked him question after question, but to no avail. He killed him when he spouted a rude remark about my body.

"Search his body," I told Calder. "These people usually keep their hired notes on their person."

It wasn't long until Calder found my note. I opened it rapidly. "They were hired by a man named Yngljot," I replied.

Ralof's eyes went wide with revelation. "Yngljot is a Stormcloak soldier. He seems to have a vendetta against you because you ended up on the front lines of the Whiterun battle instead of him."

"Why is that a problem?" I asked.

"He was supposed to end up at the front, and Ulfric replaced him with you. He's hated you ever since." Ralof admitted.

"And you never thought to mention this to me?" I yelled.

"I never dreamed that he would do anything to you."

I sighed. "Do you know where he is?"

"Last I heard he was at the Rift Stormcloak camp, where Galmar is."

"I didn't know we had one there."

"Ulfric made sure to add camps in the holds we control. Look, what are you going to do?"

"I'm going to kill him," I said. "I've always hunted down and killed anyone who has sent thugs after me. He deserves to die for his cowardice," I stepped towards him. "Don't get in my way Ralof, please."

"I won't. He deserves it." Ralof grimaced.

I nodded. "I need to leave for Riften right away."

"When have you last slept?" Calder asked.

"I don't know," I admitted. How long had it been? Two days? Three?

"You haven't rested in days. We'll go tomorrow after you've slept."

"But – " I protested. _Is my housecarl ordering me around? _

"But nothing," Calder interrupted. "Go get some sleep. We'll leave tomorrow morning."


	9. Chapter 9

IX

Back in Falkreath, I dragged myself out of the bed that Calder and Ralof practically forced me to sleep in for the night. I was high on a revenge kick and couldn't sleep anyways, even though I _did _try. I was sure that I could have been in Riften by now if it weren't for my pesky friends. Every second I wasn't on the road, was another second that that bastard Yngljot was alive.

_Pesky friends_, I thought with a groan. They were just trying to look out for me. Even still, I was used to doing things my way. I was powerful enough to do whatever I wanted, _whenever. _I bit my lip. I needed this kill. I _needed _his blood on my hands.

_If they aren't up by the time that I get ready, I'm leaving, _I thought stubbornly. I used a wash basin full of clean, hot water to clean myself up. Granted, it wasn't a bath, but it certainly was the best that this Inn had to offer. I spent a long while washing the dirt off of my body from yesterday's fight.

When I felt, looked and _smelt _clean, I walked into the tavern and asked Valga whether she had some food and drink for travelling purposes.

She fixed me a sly smile. "I have the supplies if you have the coin."

I snorted. As she fixed me up, Ralof and Calder were coming out of their rooms, looking ready to leave. "Can we go?" I asked impatiently when Valga handed me my supplies.

Calder smiled at my insistence, while Ralof fixed me with a scowl. He was _not _a morning person.

(~~)

The road to the Rift wasn't as harsh as I thought it would be. I had been travelling Skyrim for quite some time now, but I had always found it odd when a path was clear of animals, bandits or other oddities.

The Rift Stormcloak camp was nestled on the side of a mountain, remaining cloaked for enemy attacks. The three of us finally arrived at the camp on our horses, by late afternoon. We had to stop a lot for their horses to rest, while my Shadowmere could ride much longer than a regular horse could.

The two men could see how annoyed I was. Normally I wouldn't have cared, but this was a mission I was looking forward to. I ran over in my head the many ways I thought of on which to kill Yngljot. Would it be with fire? A blade? I hadn't decided on an option when the three of us walked into camp.

"Hey, you're Bone-Breaker right?" A nearby soldier asked me. "The Dragonborn?" He looked at me in awe.

"Bone-Breaker?" _What in Oblivion was with these nicknames? _"Ah, never mind. Is Yngljot here?" I asked impatiently.

The soldier nodded. "Sure, I'll get him for you Dragonborn."

It wasn't long until the soldier returned with a large, hulking Nord that could probably crush me with his fist. If I didn't have this reassuring power inside of me, I would have been deathly afraid. The death glare he gave me was enough to flip my stomach in anticipation. _So it begins. _

"So you're Yngljot," I commented, unimpressed.

"And you're Ulfric's whore. The _legendary _Dragonborn." He glowered down at me. I saw a crowd forming around us, gawking at our exchange.

A surge of anger flew through me and I fought to control it. _Soon, _I told my evil soul. _Not yet. _"You call yourself a Nord? You're a coward. What kind of man would hire men to try to kill me? After all, I'm just a _woman. _Can't take me down yourself?" I smirked.

Yngljot looked at his fellow Stormcloaks. They were all murmuring to each other, wondering whether or not I was telling the truth. I heard Ralof's voice behind me. "It's true! He hired men to kill her! We found the orders on their leader's body!"

"Maybe you should challenge me to a duel, see if you live?" I hissed. "I intend to finish this."

He drew his weapon from his back; a steel war-hammer. I held up my hand. "But, I wonder what reason could you possibly have to want to kill me? Because of what happened at Whiterun?" I scoffed, drew my sword and summoned a fireball in my hands. "No, I think not. There's a bigger reason for your actions. I want to know what it is."

"You want to know?" He growled, swinging his weapon at me, _almost _taking me by surprise.

"Yes, please," I said with mock politeness. I jumped out of the way in time to see his war-hammer coming crashing down to the ground. _That would have crushed my arm, _I thought. The crowd around us started to disperse, giving us the room to combat.

"I suppose you wouldn't remember what happened. You never saw me, but I was _there._"

"Where?" I asked, maintaining my offensive stance.

"You killed my father," he said evenly.

I raised an eyebrow. "Who was your father?" I murmured.

His face became dark. "Years ago, you and that dark-elf bitch you were with, infiltrated a camp and killed all that were present. My father was the leader, and you just killed him. I watched you! I watched the sadistic smile on your face when you stabbed him through the heart! You enjoyed it!" He started to yell.

_This had to be when I was in the Dark Brotherhood. The Dunmer he was talking about must have been Gabriella. There was no one else that it could be. He knows,_ I thought with a slight panic. After a bit of thought, I recollected what contract he was referring to. "Ah, yes I remember," I whispered.

"Dragonborn, what's going on?" Ralof asked.

"I'll tell you what!" Yngljot yelled. "Your _precious_ Dragonborn is a Dark Brotherhood assassin!"

"Was," I corrected. "Not anymore." _Fuck. I can't believe I let this get out. _

All around us, the soldiers were quiet. _There goes my credibility. _"I thought the Dark Brotherhood were wiped out," a soldier commented near me.

"No, it isn't. They are very much alive, and killing for coin," Yngljot answered smugly. He knew he had me in a tight fix. This was something that happened to me rarely. I would find a way out of this; I had to.

"She's probably planning to kill us all! Getting close to our leader is one thing. She'll murder him while he sleeps." Yngljot yelled loud enough for everyone to hear.

_This asshole has to die. _"Do you know how ludicrous you sound?" I asked calmly.

"You killed people for a living, and _I _am the crazy one?"

"Yes, I did kill people for coin, I'll give you that," I said in a low dangerous voice. "But everyone I killed deserved it. Your father included."

"He didn't deserve to die!" He threw his war-hammer at me and I narrowly avoided the assault.

"Didn't deserve it?! He was a bandit! He raped and almost beat our client's daughter to death. Your father was a fucking scum bag! Is that who you look up to?" I shouted back at him, trying to find an opening to strike him at.

"You're a lying bitch!"

I laughed. "I don't think so. Your _dear_ father was a rapist and a criminal. Did you hear the way he screamed? He died a coward, just like you're going to."

"You're the coward. Hiding behind your Shout! I bet you can't win a fight without it!" He taunted.

"Oh I _will_ win without it. Were you hiding in the shadows while we killed your father? Couldn't face us on your own?"

Yngljot shouted in protest. "I saw what you did! I could never find that bitch you were with, but you were different. I recognized you immediately. Now just to kill you!" He said as an afterthought.

We started to fight then. I had a hard time avoiding his blows; he was stronger than I had anticipated. I could tell by the ferocity of his weapon strikes that he would do whatever it took to bring me down. I had to make sure that I would do the same.

Suddenly, I missed my footing, and my stomach collided with his elbow. The wind was knocked out of me and I fell to the ground in agony. Everything was almost a blur after that. Instead of killing me, he hit me over and over again with his fists, until my vision started swimming. I vaguely heard him say over and over again, "Scream bitch, scream!"

Everything was so far away, I felt like I was floating on air. Then just as I was about to lose consciousness, I heard someone speak to me.

"Get up Dovahkiin."

I couldn't answer him back, but the man continued to speak to me. His voice was so familiar. It was deep, rough and it made my stomach convulse. "Get up! Finish what you started Dragonborn. Defend. Your. Honour."

_Yes, I will. _

I sank back into reality then. My face was on fire; I wished then that I had learned some healing spells. I heard a lot of yelling around me and my eyes opened painfully. I was energized then, feeling like I had just woken up from a nap. Ralof was beside me asking if I was okay.

I noticed Yngljot was held back by Calder and another soldier who I couldn't recognize now. Ralof helped me to stand, and I spit out a mouthful of blood that had collected from my injuries. "Dragonborn, don't fight anymore. He'll kill you," Ralof hissed.

I glared at him. "Stay out of this," I warned.

He didn't respond and I turned to give Yngljot a bloody grin. "Come and get me," I said as finality.

His eyes widened, but he did what I said. He started to charge me. I summoned a massive fireball in my hand and threw it at him before he could finish the job. He screamed, and I drew my sword stabbing him through the middle of the body.

He fell at the same time that I did, all my energy exhausted. I stayed awake just long enough to see Yngljot grow still. Relief washed over me and I fainted in Ralof's arms.

(~~)

I woke up sometime later inside a spacious tent. I was wrapped in furs, and I felt something cold on my face. My skin was sore and I felt a high heat throughout my body. I had a fever. That had to be it. "Calder?" I asked, thinking of the first name that came to mind.

"By the Nine," I heard my housecarl's voice from somewhere near me. "Are you awake?"

"What happened?" My voice barely came out in a whisper.

He knelt down beside me and took my hand in his. His skin was warm, while mine felt unbearably cold. The temperature change made me want to scream in agony. "Yngljot beat you half to death. But you managed to kill him before he killed you. You fainted, and were brought into this tent. Your wounds have been dressed, but you have a high fever. The healer wants to try you healing potions now to try to get your fever down."

"How long have I been out?"

"A couple days…The healer is baffled on how you're surviving," he bit his lip. "Galmar sent a courier to Jarl Ulfric to inform him on your condition."

I resisted the urge to laugh. _He would never come to see me. _

(~~)

I wasn't sure how many hours had passed, but the healer had tried every kind of healing potion he had with him. Nothing was bringing my fever down. No one knew why the potions wouldn't work.

I knew I was going to die.

It wasn't pessimism; it was just a gut feeling. I couldn't bring myself to tell them that the reason that I wasn't healing was because I wasn't mortal. Paarthurnax once told me that my life would be extended for a long period of time and that my soul would do anything to keep me alive at all costs. Why was it turning on me now?

That night, as I could feel myself drifting off to sleep, all I could think of was how much I wanted to see Ulfric. I wouldn't get to see him before I died and that thought alone was paralyzing.

_**A/N:**__This was one of my shorter chapters, but I thought this was a good place to end! I want to thank everyone for the follows, favourites and amazing reviews I have gotten lately. Every one I get makes me smile. I thank you all. _


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